Domestic Energy Vampires
by UberNerd121
Summary: Moving this out of the crossover section to reach more readers! Collection of short stories centered around a couple of background characters as they strive for their own happily ever after. (Mostly domestic fluff.) Includes elements from another Disney cartoon and a handful of original characters. Not in chronological order, but you can find a detailed timeline on my profile.
1. Doves

**A/N:** _Hello dear reader! I thought it best to give you some information before jumping in. During April of 2016, I decided to take on a new challenge as I was just coming out of a depression and wanted to get back into writing. I decided to start taking an hour out of every day to write 100 words. It was mostly for my own benefit before I decided to start posting them, and I have to say that the first 10 or so aren't great, especially if you aren't familiar with the characters. However, as time went on, I started to get my mojo back, and the stories became longer and more substantial. I keep all of them here as a reminder of my growth, but you might find the most enjoyment if you skipped a few chapters in! Don't worry, they're not in chronological order anyway. I'm more about the joys of character interactions than building a suspenseful continuum. If you're looking for something more complete with the following characters, you can check out the timeline on my profile. It'll clear up all the confusion! Anyway, thanks for reading. I hope you manage to glean entertainment out of my self-indulgent fluff. (But seriously. I promise they get better the farther you go.)_

* * *

Two, wearing her Garden Experts apron, pulled the curtains back and flooded the room with predawn. Nos-4-a2, not quite awake, rolled away from the light while Two's eyeforms traced a flock of geese through the blue-gray sky.

Their honking cut through the chilled air, awakening a gentle cacophony of bird calls. Nos folded a pillow over his head.

" _Coo-oooo, coo coo._ "

The Energy Vampire's optic shot open.

"What is _that_?" he growled.

"What? What's wrong?"

He turned back over and glared toward the window.

"That bird, there's been one outside my study all week and it's driving me mad!"

"What bird?"

" _Coo-oooo, coo coo._ "

" _THAT_ one!"

Two giggled, hovering to the side of the bed and kissing his forehead. "That's a dove."

Nos's brow furrowed. He flipped back over with a huff. "I'm finding you a new nickname."


	2. Reading

Two stretched out on the sofa in the space next to Nos-4-a2, her head in his lap. The lamp on the table next to the couch encompassed their surroundings in an orb of light. Now that she had it focused on her novel, she started flipping through the book at the rate of a page every few seconds. Two's collection of books, almost three thousand in number, spanned as many time periods, languages, and genres as she had been able to gather from the _Axiom's_ archives, but the way she went through them, Nos wondered whether they would be enough to keep her entertained for long. After forty years, she had read almost every book they owned.


	3. Cramped

"What do you have your wings out for?" Nos-4-a2 asked, approaching the sofa across from the holoscreen. He held a power cell in each hand.

Two blinked in his direction. She was slouched in the corner of the loveseat, her deactivated blue appendages splayed behind her.

"I don't know how you always have yours in. They shift my center of gravity back and make me feel crowded... but I guess I'm just not used to them."

Nos looked at the alien structures sprouting from her back. He extended his own amber wings before taking the seat next to her, handing her one of the power cells.


	4. Dancing

Above, a tapestry of stars; below, a sea of clouds.

Nos-4-a2 offered her his hand. Two smiled, laced her fingers with his, and placed her free hand on his shoulder. He held her waist and they began to sway.

In the absence of the moon, the couple animated the sky in a swirl of blue and red, dancing to music only they could hear, carried by the wind. The moisture that clung to them after their passage through the clouds grew into frost at such high altitude, setting their clothes aglitter. Without any obstacles to absorb the sound, their laughter carried far through the night.


	5. Work

"Where're you goin'?" Fletcher asked, twisting around in Nos-4-a2's arms. Two checked through her bag one last time to make sure she had everything she needed.

"I'm going to work, darling."

"Why?"

"Well... even though I'd rather stay here with you, I need to do my job. If I don't, we wouldn't be able to live in such a pretty place," Two tried to eliminate as many subsequent "whys" as possible.

Fletcher deemed the information logical enough to accept. "When will you be home?"

Two secured her bag to her apron and smiled. "Before you know it! You just take care of Dad today, ok?"

Fletcher looked up at Nos, squinting at his face. Nos marveled at how comprehensive the probeling's gaze was. "Ok. But why's Dad so nervous?"

Two laughed, Nos-4-a2's eyebrow shooting up in surprise.

"Look at you go, Fletcher! Your sensors are better tuned than mine are!" Two beamed, pecking his forehead.

Nos made a mental note to better guard his emotional output now that he'd be spending so much time with Fletcher. "Don't worry, little one, I'm just going to miss your mother today."

Two sighed with a bittersweet smile. "This is hard enough without your moping. I'll see you in a bit."

"Of course, love." Nos held Fletcher to the side, bending down to give Two a kiss goodbye.

"Ew," Fletcher groaned.

Nos smirked and straightened up, rolling his optic. "Take care of yourself today."

"You too. I'm going to miss you so much, Fletcher. I love both of you."

"Love you, too."

"Love you Mom!"

Two waved as she hovered over the threshold and took off over the gravel path toward town. They waved as long as they could see her.


	6. Directive

What make-believe? What fairy tales? Life was hard and horrible and dark and unfair, but here he saw a world he'd never given the slightest chance to exist. Here was warmth, here was trust, a true connection, faith, and it filled him to the brim with satisfaction. He would want nothing if he could keep this for the rest of his worldly existence. How silly, how small he had been before she opened his mind! The universe was an empty place without her love. It came more naturally than his most basic programming. Anything was well worth giving up for this.


	7. Family Dinner

Fletcher hovered at the door between the kitchen and the dining room. Through the window, he could see Nos-4-a2 sitting at the head of the table, completely absorbed in whatever work he had on his tablet. Fletcher concentrated all his energy within himself to cloak his electrical output, blending into the background emissions of the house. Once he felt like he had things under control, he silently pushed the door open, approaching the table so as not to attract his father's attention.

Like a skilled burglar, he snuck one of the three power cells off the table. He grinned and turned his back on his father, but before he could make it very far, Nos-4-a2 plucked him out of the air and unceremoniously dropped him in the nearest seat.

"So nice you could join us for dinner. Please wait for your mother to arrive before you start eating," Nos hummed without looking up from his work.


	8. Lazy Afternoon

On the holoscreen, a program played documenting the development of animal life in Earth's recovering ecosystems. It was Fletcher's latest way to satisfy his growing curiosity. He sat in the middle of the sofa between Nos and Two, who listened to the show as they focused on their own business. Two sketched the layout of a garden for one of her clients, though it had been a while since she'd made any progress, and she now doodled flowers in the margin of her tablet. Nos-4-a2 thumbed through a novel, reading at a lazy pace. Fletcher sucked thoughtfully on a battery, his homework abandoned on the floor.


	9. Promise

" _Sister Two has not been responding well to the program," Three murmured._

" _Be patient, she just needs time... you can't say she's been completely unresponsive," One pointed out._

" _She'd be much farther along if we brought her out of the Henrys' farm," Four insisted. A cold dread passed through Two's core._

" _No, I think that would make matters worse, she just isn't comfortable with social situations yet. I think she takes comfort in the fields," Five suggested._

" _Of course, just as we_ all _do. We are_ made _to deal with vegetation, letting her alone out there will only lead to stagnation."_

" _Excuse me?"_

 _Two's sisters all turned to face her as she entered the room._

" _I'm not going to leave the Henrys. I like it there, and I think they like me! That's all I want right now. I'm not ready to find a family of my own yet... but you'll see. I promise I'll get there."_

* * *

Two opened her eyeforms and stared at the ceiling. Gray light spilled from under the curtains, defining their bedroom. She flexed her fingers, ran a quick internal diagnostic, and blinked to clear her vision. She was home.

The probe turned to her right, finding Nos-4-a2 asleep with his back turned to her. She cuddled against him, pressing her visor into the nape of his neck, vainly trying to clear her mind and go back offline.

 _You'll see._


	10. Observatory

The first time Nos-4-a2 told Two he wanted to have an observatory built in their new home, she didn't believe him. Sure, the projector system was still within their budget, but...

"Doesn't that seem a little _too_ extravagant?"

Nos had given her a blank look. In the end, she didn't have any real reason to object.

Thick, blue carpeting lined the floor of the cavernous room, free of any furniture ‒ Two was determined to find some lounge chairs once everything else was settled, but for the time being, laying on their backs suited them just fine. Nos fiddled with the controller, selecting a collection of different planets, star systems, and nebulae from around the galaxy. Two watched the colorful images with wide optics ‒ maybe she could understand the appeal of having an observatory.

She turned her head to smile up at Nos, but he seemed lost in thought. In the otherwise dark room, his metal reflected all the pinpricks of light whirling on the ceiling. For the first time, she started to realize why he had been so dead set on having his own piece of space.

"...You miss it out there, don't you?"

Nos blinked out of his contemplation. He smiled, sighed, and took her hand.

"I wouldn't say I miss it, exactly, but I guess... there's a lot I never got to see. A lot I never had the chance to show you, either..."

Two squeezed his hand. The image above them changed from a binary star system to a planet striped through with a rainbow of different colors, surrounded by glittering moons. What was she supposed to say? She was the reason he chose Earth to carry out his life sentence.

"...Can you tell me about that one?" she asked after some silence passed.

He gave her another, warmer smile. "Sure."


	11. Pet Store

Fletcher flew to the back of the pet store, disappearing behind the shelves where the fluorescent lights went dark and everything basked in the blue glow of the fish tanks. When Nos and Two caught up to him, he had his face pressed against a cubicle of snails.

"Mom! Dad! These are exactly the ones I was talking about!"

"Yes, darling, but don't you want to see some of the fish before you pick out your snails?" Two suggested, pointing toward the section of colorful, tropical fish.

"Come on, Mom, fish would only make the tank dirtier and probably eat the plants."

Two did her best to seem like she didn't mind either way, but couldn't quite mask her aversion to the mollusks. Nos hovered forward, putting his hand on Fletcher's shoulder. "Why don't you just take a look? There are a lot of different species here, you never know what you'll find."

Fletcher contemplated it for a minute before conceding to check out some of the other creatures on display.

Nos winked at Two, who smiled in relief.

"Whoa... look at these guys!" Fletcher called from a few tanks down. Some dark, streamlined fish rested in piles around the bottom of the tank, others pressed flat against the glass, grazing the surface with mouths like suction cups.

"Ple-co-sto-mus. Cool!"

Two groaned, looking up at Nos. "Why couldn't he just want a _goldfish_ or something?"


	12. Historian

"Wall.E, what's this?" Fletcher called. The young Energy Vampire was staying with the Earthclasses while his parents were away, and had tagged along with his uncle to see his storage unit of treasures from his centuries alone on Earth. Wall.E loved sharing his collection, and Fletcher felt he would never tire of looking through the ancient odds and ends.

The yellow unit treaded to where Fletcher stood, examining the box that he held. It was made of thin, worn plastic, all of its labels illegible. Opening it revealed a faded machine similar to a book in size and shape, some neatly spooled (if dried and cracked) wires, and a crumbling paper manual.

"It's a video game console, I think," Wall.E appraised.

"Wow!" Fletcher peered into the relatively undisturbed packaging, "Is this really from the 22nd century? It doesn't look that bad!"

"Found it deep in a warehouse during a sandstorm," Wall.E explained, "There were hundreds piled around in stacks, but this one was in the best shape!"

Fletcher's eyeforms flashed. "Think it'd still work if we plugged it in?"

"Only one way to find out," Wall.E grinned, "Let's take it home. Better grab that box, too."

Fletcher lifted the container he pointed out, looking inside. "There are like three hundred games in here!"

"There might not be too many that'll fit in this, but it's worth a shot," Wall.E shrugged, "Anyway, if we can't set it up, your dad probably can."

"Do you mean... I can _keep_ it?"

Wall.E nodded enthusiastically. "It's worthless sitting around here! You'll be able to put it to good use."


	13. Mother's Day

Nos-4-a2 quietly opened the door, Fletcher on one arm and a bouquet in the other, peering into the dark bedroom. Two was still asleep.

Fletcher slipped from his father's grasp, flicking his wings out and flapping toward the bed.

" _Fletcher, Fletcher, wait!_ " Nos whispered. " _Go to that window. I'll open the curtains on this side, okay?_ "

The probeling nodded vigorously, landing at the window and clinging to the thick, red fabric. Nos took the curtain on his side and gave Fletcher a thumbs up, signaling him to heave with all his might.

The room burst into light with a cry of "Happy Mothers' Day!"

Two booted up with a gasp as Fletcher flopped across her.

"Oh, Fletcher," she blinked unevenly as the others laughed, "good morning!"

"Morning Momma! We picked you flowers!"

"Oh my gosh! What a wonderful surprise," Two purred, bunching her arms around Fletcher and scratching the gap between his wings.

Nos presented the bundle of variegated roses, bending down to kiss her forehead. "I know this doesn't hold a candle to your arrangements, but Fletcher helped me find the best ones in the garden."

"No, Nossy, they're gorgeous! Come here," Two held her arm out. Nos set the bouquet on the bedside table before landing in bed, pulling her and Fletcher close.

"You guys," Two beamed, practically buried by her family, "Thank you so much! This is already the best Mothers' Day ever."


	14. Tired

When Nos-4-a2 entered the den, he was sure he'd just be passing through ‒ it was almost midnight, and Two had woken up so early that morning, she would surely have been in bed for hours.

Yet, when Nos passed the couch, there she was. Two laid flat across the cushions, fast asleep with a book open on her chest.

"Good grief, Eve," he laughed, "I told you I'd be late..."

Two stirred but didn't wake. Nos hoisted his bag higher on his shoulder, taking the book from her chest and laying it on the coffee table. Leaning so his bag wouldn't swing down, he wedged his arms under her, lifting her bridal-style.

Two stayed deeply asleep as Nos carried her to their room and put her down in bed. He tossed his bag on one of the armchairs in front of their fireplace and laid his cloak on top of it, hovering to the windows on either side of the bed to pull the curtains closed. Before he laid down, he unclipped Two's cloak, leaving it on the floor because he was too tired to bother doing anything more. He fell heavily onto the mattress and pulled the sheets around them both, bringing her close, cuddling his head above hers on the pillow.

"G'night, love."

" _Night, Nossy,,_ " she whispered.


	15. Piano Lessons

"See, Fletcher? Like this," Two slowly played a C major scale and arpeggio, her fingers lightly clicking against the keys.

Fletcher still didn't know why his mother thought music was so important, much less practical, but thought he might as well try to apply what she'd taught him so far. He processed the way she played for a moment before replicating the pattern a few octaves higher.

"Perfect! Now try the next one on the paper. Remember, you play all the sharp notes on the black keys except for..."

"E# and B#," Fletcher recited, "which are enharmonics of F and C."

"Right. Take it at the same tempo as the last one," Two instructed.

Fletcher carefully played the C# major scale up and down, only pausing for a moment to figure out the arpeggio before he finished.

"That's great, Fletcher! If you keep practicing, you might be able to play better than I can by the end of the month," Two beamed.

Fletcher's optics swelled at her praise. He decided that music was important after all.


	16. Glow

"...Eve, can you feel that?" Nos-4-a2 asked. The twilight air swayed the boughs of the magnolia tree above them, stirring the reeds at the edge of the nearby pond. Nos and Two sat side by side on a bench in the gardens around their home.

"What do you mean?" Two was taken aback by the awe in Nos's sudden question.

He put his hand over the curve of her containment chamber, his optics shining. "Focus your sensors within yourself."

Two gave him a look before she closed her eyeforms and concentrated. She wasn't nearly as sensitive as he was yet, so it took her a moment to find the faint something radiating beneath Nos's palm. It almost felt like his electrical signature, but not quite: while it shared his distinctive, alien waveform, it also had many of the common characteristics of Earthling technology.

Two opened her eyeforms. Her voice was hardly audible. "Nos, is that...?"

The smile he gave her filled her with so much warmth and love that she began to cry. He nodded and wrapped his arms around her, nestling his head against hers. They held each other with more excitement and anticipation than either could contain.


	17. Happy

"Are you happy?"

Nos-4-a2 lifted his gaze to the sky. The pristine expanse was laden with thick, white clouds drifting lazily toward the eastern horizon. His first impulse was to say yes. Really, how could he complain? He was free from evil, and the only downside of serving his life sentence on Earth were the periodic evaluations.

What kept his speakers from issuing that affirmative syllable?

Maybe, Nos reasoned, he just wasn't allowed to be that comfortable yet. That didn't surprise him when he thought of all the atrocities he'd committed. He knew there were many robots who had never been found or were too damaged for revival, yet here he was, lying in a hammock next to the greatest probe in the galaxy.

After a while, he looked back down at her. She wasn't expectant; there was no judgement in her expression. She raised her hand to trace the side of his face, sending warmth through every wire in his being. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.

"You make me happy."


	18. Melon-Headed Scheme

There were many reasons that Nos-4-a2 chose the land he did to build their home. First, the Unibuck went far in the Earth's budding interstellar economy, and the dusty, barren land was cheap to begin with. Second, the base of an ancient skyscraper provided the builders with a perfect foundation for the mansion. Third, it was perfectly positioned on the border of the Axiom colony so they could be close to Two's family while still being suitably far from the densely populated center. Finally, the plot still had plenty of land for Two to tend to her heart's content.

Because of its foundation, the house was square in shape: a large courtyard in the center gave it the likeness of a square donut. The main entrance opened at the south, three levels of offices on the east stretch were made into bedrooms, the storage area to the west became the lab, the conference rooms to the north were built into the two story library, and industrial elevator shafts were turned into tall structures rising from either northern corner. The northeastern rise, wider and shorter than the one on the west, housed Nos-4-a2's observatory. The other was built into a tower housing a spiral staircase that led to a single room nearly five stories above the ground level. The room was furnished with a few cushy chairs and an end table between them facing Two's piano. Four windows, evenly spaced about the round chamber, looked out for miles around.

For Fletcher, the high windows were an irresistible opportunity for experimentation.

"I dunno, Fletcher, this doesn't seem like a good idea," Darwin said for the umpteenth time, examining a holographic tablet. It displayed the design of the machine that Fletcher held outside the window, hardly more than watermelon strapped to a pair of broad, aluminum wings.

"Why? The math is sound. As long as the wind stays dead, this'll circle the tower twice before it lands in the fountain!" Fletcher declared. He was carefully unfolding various flaps on the wings.

"No, the math is _not_ sound! I told you we didn't do any calculations for air resistance!" Darwin insisted.

Fletcher rolled his eyeforms. "Don't you pay _any_ attention in physics?" He readied the contraption for release, "Air resistance is _always_ negligible!"

Darwin didn't have time to retort before Fletcher launched the melon. He scrambled forward, squeezing his shoulders out of the window to watch the carnage.

Despite all logic, nothing seemed amiss. The melon dropped a few yards before it caught the air, tilted into a sweeping curve, and hugged the white wall of the tower. Fletcher hollered in triumph and scrambled back inside to press against the next window.

Darwin stayed where he leaned out of the first window, his eyeforms wide. Just as he started to accept that Fletcher had been right all along, physics took over. The melon began to pick up speed and turned ever tighter toward the tower. By the time it came around again, it was doomed. Fletcher leapfrogged over Darwin in dismayed silence as the aluminum clipped the wall. Its balance was ruined and it immediately lost all speed, dropping like it had never had any forward momentum in the first place. It fell fifteen feet before destroying a solar panel on the roof of the lab below.

Fletcher slid down Darwin's back into a crumpled heap on the floor, unsheathing his wings.

"Throw me next, would you?"


	19. What's Your Damage

"Wow, Nos, this is a good look for you," Two laughed.

"Very funny. Would you just give me a hand?" he grumbled, wiping the thick fluid from his brow to keep it out of his optic.

"I'll do what I can, but it looks like you'll need to shower. What is this stuff, anyway?" Two searched the drawers of the nearest counter to find a washcloth, making no attempt to hide her amusement.

"It's a gel adhesive for a cell I'm testing, and for the love of the cosmos, do _not_ use water, that'll only activate it. Use..." Nos squinted and leaned toward the counter, checking the labels on the tin gallons. "...this solvent."

"You okay? Did you get some on your lenses?"

"No, not yet. Here, I keep the rags in this drawer," Nos made a few grabs at the handle before he got it open.

Two looked at him for a moment before she accepted the cloth he offered. She started wiping off as much as she could without the solvent. "So... you never said how this happened."

Nos scowled. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

"...Yes. That's why I asked."

When he saw the genuinely perplexed look in her eyeforms, he sighed. "Fine, fine... I know you want something to make fun of me for, but you'll probably be disappointed. I was getting something out of the bottom drawer, and when I stood up I bumped the counter. The jug fell over on top of me. That's it."

Two swiped as much goo off his forehead as she could. "You greatly overestimate my sense of humor! It's all about delivery. People will laugh when I tell this story."

The Energy Vampire groaned.

"In all seriousness, Nos, I think it's time you go in for a tune-up. Your depth perception is totally screwed up."

"What? No, that's not necessary. This was just a one-time fluke."

"Nos..."

"Computer can take care of it, he does all my repairs."

"Nos."

"I'm just clumsy, there's not even anything to fix! Do you want to change who I _am_?"

"Nos-4-a2, I love you to pieces, but you are an absolute baby about getting repairs!"


	20. Relaxant

"Nos, there you are!" Two called, hovering onto a patio overlooking Axiom Lake. They were attending a celebration of the _Axiom's_ return to Earth, and an especially lively one at that ‒ this year marked the 300th anniversary. The Earthclasses had gone all-out to host the most lavish party in the province, and it was exactly the kind of social gathering Nos-4-a2 usually avoided. However, as the number of Energy Vampires grew, it became harder and harder for him to make excuses.

He was sitting around a table with Four, Fletcher, Asteri, Darwin, and Toby.

" _Eve!_ " he drawled at full volume, rolling his rs, "The _r_ e's my _r_ adiant little _r_ ose blossom!"

Now that Two was close, she saw his undone bow tie, his half popped collar, and a couple of power cells drained in front of him.

"Thank God you're here, Mom!" Fletcher called, "He's gonna hurt himself if he has another one."

Two laughed, "Nos, are those relaxants? How many have you had?"

"I might've had a _few_ ," he shrugged, speaking now in a Scottish accent.

Toby wheezed with laughter, his head hitting the table.

"I haven't had any more than he has!" Nos nodded toward his grandson, now speaking in a perfect imitation of his voice. The whole table fell into laughter.

Two looked at Nos in disbelief.

"He's been doing voices," Four said when she salvaged enough of her composure to speak. She was the only sober one at the table, incapable of using the Energy Vampire relaxant.

"I never would never believed this if it weren't going on right in front of me! One more of those and he'd be singing show tunes."

Nos put out his finger, taking deep breaths in an attempt to compose himself, the others quieting down to hear him.

He stood up, staggered, grabbed Two's shoulders, and looked into her visor with hazy optics. The rest of the table leaned forward in anticipation. As soon as he opened his mouth, he dissolved back into hissing laughter, leaning on Two for support.

"Nos-4-a2, I've never seen you like this before!"

"Wait, wait, hol' on..." he looked back at Asteri, "What did you want me to say? I can't remember!"

She vigorously shook her head, still laughing, covering her mouth with both hands. "I was joking!"

"No! No, Eve, you _have_ to hear this, it's ‒ it's _so_ funny," he straightened up as much as he could, letting go of her shoulders to lean on the back of his chair.

"Umm... it's... _Oh, oh_ I remember!"

He made a show of pretending to clear his throat and proceeded to quote Two in flawless pitch and timbre. "I hope he'll have a good time, but pig's'll fly before Nos-4-a2 learns to loosen up at a party!"


	21. Quirk

The EVE Probes, like all serial robots, had a hard time standing out as individuals. The easiest thing to do was change the way they presented themselves: some modified the color of their metal or added markings, others altered the colors of their eyeforms, and most took to wearing clothing and decorations. A few even went as far as changing their voices, most notably the EVEs who didn't identify as female. As a final and most essential matter of choice, they all went about pursuing their own (though usually botanical) hobbies and careers. The capability and adaptability of the EVE Probes left nothing out of reach.

Still, self awareness is an odd thing. While the most noticeable differences were based on personal preference, subtler traits seemed to emerge between individuals without any rhyme or reason.

Nos-4-a2 pondered this as Two pressed her face firmly against his back.

"Er... something I can help you with, love?"

She only nuzzled her face deeper into his cape, bunching the plush fabric between her fingers. It was a new cloak he'd ordered for wearing around the house made of a soft, velvety material, still light enough to keep him from warming up. At the moment, Nos was peering into the bathroom mirror, polishing a dull spot of metal on his cheek. He paused to address the probe clinging to his back.

"Is everything alright?"

She released her grip to reach over his shoulders, sliding her hands down to the brass piece fastening his cape below his neck. Nos grinned, guessing at her intentions. Two unbuckled his cloak and took it with her back into their bedroom, Nos quickly wiping the polish off his face before turning to follow her.

He passed over the threshold just in time to see Two flop onto the sofa by the fireplace, completely buried in the folds of his cape. Nos crossed his arms. He had guessed wrong.

"...You know, darling, I'm sure it must have been hard to tell, but I was actually using that."

"I need it more," her voice came muffled through the fabric.

Nos stood over the couch, staring down at the deep purple mass that hid Two. It wasn't worth trying to get it back from her at this point: one of her nonsensical quirks was her irresistible attraction to soft things.

He sighed and hovered to the closet to put on something else.


	22. Procrastination

"Eve, are you working on the sprinkler system again?"

"Um... I wouldn't say that I'm _working_ on it, per se..."

"Then what would you say?"

"...The sunflowers aren't getting nearly enough water. I'm saving the sunflowers."

Nos-4-a2 sighed. "Have you finished planning the layout of the Montgomerys' garden?"

"No. They don't need it until the end of this week."

"Are you telling me that you'll be able to finish plotting out Mr. Montgomery's 'old-fashioned high-end tribute to the 22nd century' garden in the next few days? It took you all last week just to choose the flowers."

"That's my process. I work well under pressure."

"That's the fattest lie you've ever told. Come on, you're just making it hard on yourself."

Two whined, looked longingly at the system of timers in front of her. "... _Ffffine_."


	23. Sunrise

Out of the kitchen window, past Two's gardens, the morning mist smoothed the open land into a hazy sea of pale honey, contoured by the thin, watery light of the rising sun. Two blinked. She hadn't realized it was morning.

No point in trying to sleep now. She opened a cabinet and chose a solar power cell before leaving the kitchen and slipping out of the front door. She was still squinting, her visor not quite adjusted to the brightness after spending all night working in relative darkness. Tucking the battery into her containment chamber, she unsheathed her wings to balance herself. They fizzed with a blue glow as she gave them an awkward flap, rising past the white walls of the mansion. She wanted to sit on top of the observatory, but she was out of practice ‒ rather, since she had turned, she hadn't practiced much at all. Two floated over the roof of the kitchen before sitting in the shade under the eaves of the second level of the repair room, holding the cell in both hands and emitting a power absorption field. She watched the fog burn off as the sun climbed ever higher.


	24. Classical Music

"...Do you hear that?" Nos asked just above a whisper.

Two looked up from her book, keeping still to listen. They were in Nos's study when the sound of distant piano playing drifted down through the halls. It came from the tower.

"Could Fletcher be practicing?" Two wondered.

Nos stood up and hovered out to the library, Two following just behind him. They reached the doors to the hall and turned right, coming to the entrance at the base of the tower. Two followed Nos's lead, masking her signal and flying straight up the middle of the spiral staircase. They stopped at the trap door.

There was no question about it now ‒ Fletcher was playing. He stumbled and repeated himself, meticulously perfecting a few bars under tempo before going back and starting from the beginning. Nos and Two looked at each other, smiling. Two reached out and knocked on the wooden trap door before easing it open.

"Oh ‒ Mom!" Fletcher bolted from the stool. Nos popped up behind Two. An egg carton filled with dirt sprouted tiny bean plants on the windowsill behind the piano.

"Sorry, sorry, we didn't mean to startle you! You're doing so well!"

"Oh, uh... thanks," Fletcher warbled.

"So what were you practicing? Is it something from one of your video games, or did you just run out of other things to do?" Nos smirked.

"Hey, come on! It's an experiment! If plants are supposed to like listening to classical music, I thought they might appreciate a live performance even more."


	25. Anxiety

Two paced back and forth, pulling her fingers off and letting them snap back in place. She hadn't blinked in the fifteen minutes Nos had been standing with her, her eyeforms pointed down toward the carpet. She radiated high-frequency anxiety. Nos fidgeted.

What could he do to help? The problem seemed beyond him, it wasn't like he could solve it. What did she always do to comfort him? He watched her tugging her fingers and drifting in circles and knew he'd go mad if he didn't try something soon.

At a loss, the Energy Vampire grabbed the edges of his cloak and stretched it out as far as it could go. Two hovered, completely unaware, straight into his arms. He closed them around her so that she was completely covered.

Nos felt her go completely still, so he rested his head awkwardly on top of hers.

Two blinked. Nos wasn't sure what to say. She closed her eyeforms and rested her head against his chest.


	26. Homecoming

The crowd seemed impenetrable, but she knew she only had to wait. Every time she went to the aerospace station it seemed like more of a hassle than the last. Only one thing could ever make it worth the trip, and he wasn't anywhere in sight.

Of course, that was his style. While Two hovered up to look over the crowds, Nos could pick her electrical signature out of the mass and plotted a path to sneak up behind her. It was no simple task, dodging through the currents of travelers, ducking to avoid being seen, keeping his bag slung over his shoulder, but Two had come into his sight.

His power surged. She always dressed up to meet him, and this time was no exception. Her sheer blue cloak hung by a fine mesh of silver chains below her head port, and above her visor rested a band of tiny hydrangea clusters, more chains connecting them behind her head. Nos grinned. The chains were always fun to take off.

He was behind her now, and she was still looking toward the boarding gate. One of the larger groups standing between him and his EVE moved into the foot traffic, so he took the opportunity to pounce. Two shrieked as he flung his arms around her middle, lifting her higher above the ground.

"Nos-4-a2!" she laughed, twisting around to face him.

He laughed as well and pecked her forehead. Two promptly threw her arms around his neck and pressed her visor to his lips, sending a giddy thrill through his wires.

Her smile was distilled joy. "Welcome home!"


	27. Moody

Two was used to coming online in Nos-4-a2's arms. Though neither moved while they were in sleep mode, Nos tended to wake during the night and groggily cuddle her as he faded in and out of dreams. He wasn't programmed to sleep through nights the way EVE Probes were.

Two couldn't be happier as his object of snuggling choice, and depending on how he held her, she learned to decipher what sorts of dreams he'd had. On this particular morning, his face was buried against her chest and his arms were cradling the curve of her frame. It almost felt like he was hiding. He ignored her start-up chime ‒ he could sense her waking up without it.

Two worked her arms around his shoulders as her systems came online, looking down at the top of his head.

"Morning, Nossy..." she mumbled.

He hummed against her metal.

"Everything alright?"

"Mmh."

"...You sure?"

He let out a slow, deep, "Mm-hm."

Two sighed and rested her visor against the top of his head. "Fine... but don't bother hiding anything just to look tough. I already know you're just a tender sap."

He grumbled, but she felt him smiling.


	28. It's Official

Everything is new. It's hard to say what's okay to talk about when it's not even okay for this to be happening. It's impossible to figure out how things will be from now on. I'm not sure I want to know where this is going, since he's having to build himself from scratch. I had a hard enough time rewriting my own programming, and I don't know if I'm ready to be with someone else while they do the same. Not that our cases are really comparable... I had to discover my self awareness, but he's redefining all his morals and ethics.

Yet here we are, his right arm around my shoulders, my head on his chest, watching the stars pass as the autopilot pulls us through an empty stretch of dead space. How can we be this close without being able to look at each other? I'd be lying if I said it wasn't comfortable, or that a tingling warmth didn't blossom from every point of contact. All things considered, I think I do love him. One told me I would know when I felt it, and if this isn't it, then I really am defective. I just worry that when he said it... well, I believe he thinks he means it, but is he even capable? He's changed so much lately, it wouldn't be crazy to think that he might misinterpret his feelings...

"Eve?" he murmurs, bringing me from my thoughts.

"Yes?"

"You're vulnerable."

I draw back so that I can see his optics. He looks tired. "What do you mean by _that_?"

"I'm sorry I haven't mentioned it before, but I've felt you letting your guard down lately. Because of what happened last night, I can read you like any other robot if you're not trying to keep me out. I... understand your concern."

"Oh, I'm... sorry ‒ "

"No, don't be. I don't want you to worry that I'm inside your head whenever I'm around, and I can keep to myself. Your feelings now were just rather... loud."

"Oh."

He looks out the window again, so I do the same.

"...Have you ever been in love before, Eve?"

"I... thought I was. Twice. Not relationships, just... infatuation. It was a really long time ago."

"And... this is different?"

I nod. "Very."

I feel him sigh more than I hear it.

"Have you been in love?"

"If I had, I don't think we would have met."

"...Why?"

"I would have quit then. All that's left to do now is either disappear or get caught, so one way or the other, I wouldn't have been the one to kidnap you on Trade World."

I look up at him again, searching his face. He's still staring out the window, but he looks completely serious. "...You quit?"

He meets my eyeforms, cocking his brow. "Um... obviously. You can't be in love and call yourself evil without lying about one or the other. I probably would have offed myself after I realized... you know... but I had a feeling that you would help me make up for it somehow."

I grasp vainly for words. All I can do is stare back at his earnest expression. He smiles a little and I have the comfort of knowing that he can understand how I feel.

"I swear, I'm just as confused as you are about all this, probably even more so, but I'm certain of one thing. We've managed to find something that most people never have the chance to experience. As hard as it may be, I think it will be worthwhile to give this ‒ whatever it is ‒ a shot."

He offers me his left hand. I look from his optics to his talons and the light that glints off their powder-blue metal. My fingers fit oddly against his, but he closes his hand around mine and pulls me close. I bury my visor into his shoulder and relish the feeling of his head nestling down against mine.

"Yes."


	29. Fledgling

Willow stared at her infant cousin. Though she was fifteen years his senior, she had been brought into the world by a more stable version of Two's prototypical reproductive-ware. She had a shape much like Wall.E's, but her metal was pearly-white and featureless like One's. Even the display panel on her chest was just a strip of silver metal. Her frame lacked any sharp edges, and her lenses shown with a pale blue light that seemed to fascinate the young Energy Vampire. Fletcher maintained a still, silent gaze that almost seemed as cognizant as hers. The cool violet of his eyeforms was somewhat eerie, but Willow couldn't bring herself to look away. Even the periodic shuttering of her lenses came to a halt.

"Um... Aunt Two?" the older hybrid asked without breaking her young cousin's stare,"Is something wrong with Fletcher?"

The gardening probe rushed over in alarm, though she wasn't concerned for her child. Two quickly broke between her son and her niece, pushing the latter back a few paces. Fletcher blinked and resumed chewing on his blanket while Willow held her head.

"I'm sorry, dear, are you alright?" Two checked the unit over for any signs of damage.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just kind of dizzy. What was that?" Willow wondered while trying to glance back at the fledgling. Two blocked her path.

"Just look at me, honey. I'm so sorry I forgot to warn you! Fletcher is 100% Energy Vampire, so he has a whole myriad of unstable powers that he's too young to understand. He seems to like putting robots into 'empty trances.' It's an extremely basic form of mind control that allows him to access your general system data. If he keeps you focused long enough, he'll gain control of your actions and you'll be stuck staring at each other until someone breaks it up."

Willow shuddered. "He was controlling my _mind_? He's only a week old!"

Two laughed and nodded, turning to pick him up when he started to mutter at the lack of attention. She made sure that he faced away from Willow.

"Like I said, he's a born Energy Vampire! You don't have anything to worry about, though, this is just his way of finding out what he's capable of. He's harmless," Two cooed, holding him so that he could look at her visor. He recorded and analyzed every word she said, utilizing it in his ongoing effort to master speech. He hadn't said a word yet, but he clearly understood more every day.

"Wait, aren't you worried he's going to put you in a trance?" Willow warbled.

Two laughed again and shook her head. "Even if he could, he doesn't need to. He had me under his spell the moment we met."

Willow could tell that Two didn't mean "spell" in the sense of an Energy Vampire, but it didn't do much to ease her mind. "I think I'll just keep my optics to myself from now on..."


	30. Five Years Old

Nos flew to the top of the tree, the tallest on their property, at the centerpoint of the largest area in their gardens. He tossed streamers down to hang in the branches, slices of every color that caught the light and made the shade glitter. Below, Two set up tables and chairs on the grass, tying bunches of balloons to the legs and spreading out poppers and other party favors. Fletcher sat on the cobblestone wall around the base of the tree, tugging at a loose string on his new cape, one of the gifts his parents had given him that morning. It was emerald green, with a golden buckle centered beneath his head port. When he moved, little flickers of gold stitching shone around the hems.

Two finished her adjusting the centerpiece on one of the tables and looked over at the hybrid. She couldn't help smiling ‒ he was staring out at nothing again. Thought seemed to bubble from his processors, his visor glazed, but his eyeforms fixed on something only he could see.

 _Five years old. That doesn't make any sense, it hardly seems like he was born yesterday..._ Two thought. At the same time, she felt like she'd known him her entire life. How incredible was this little probe that she and Nos had brought into the world together?

"What are you thinking about, Fletcher?" she asked.

He blinked and turned his eyeforms toward her, leaning back on his hands. "How long is it going to take me to grow up?"

Nos laughed from the treetop. Fletcher scowled.

"Don't mind him, honey, Daddy hasn't quite grown up either," Two dismissed with a wave of her hand.

"I don't mean grow up like that, I mean, like, actually _grow_ ," the hybrid elaborated.

"Oh... well, that's hard to tell. You know, when you were born, you ‒ "

" ‒ 'were hardly as long as my arm.' I know, but I've only grown a foot," Fletcher rolled his eyeforms.

"That sass'll stunt your growth even more," Nos called down.

"So my growth _is_ stunted?"

"Well, not exactly," Two hummed, "Robots don't have regular growth rates, so there's nothing to compare yours to. You're growing exactly as fast as you need to, and Dr. Darickson has to follow your system's schedule to give you upgrades. If he tried to make you taller than you were ready to be, nothing would work right."

"But why? You can make other machines bigger and they still work."

"Yes, but we're not just machines," Two hovered up to Fletcher, putting her finger on his forehead, "Everything you are is right here, and we can't risk altering that just so that power can reach your extremities before you're ready. Even if we could, I wouldn't let them risk it."

"Risk what?" Fletcher blinked, taking her finger off his head and holding her hand.

Two smiled and squeezed. "Changing a single byte of the data that makes you who you are! You are perfect, and you don't need to make anything happen faster than it needs to. Just look at your precious little hands!"

" _Mooooom_ ," Fletcher groaned and tried to pull away, but he couldn't hide his smile. Two kissed the top of his head before she let him go.

"Go on and grab the fireworks from inside, alright? Everyone's going to be here soon!" she laughed.

"Cool, thanks!" Fletcher grinned. He lept up from the wall and extended his wings, flapping for altitude before taking off over gardens.

Nos came down to stand next to Two, watching Fletcher disappear over the roof of the library.


	31. Return to Normalcy

Two couldn't remember the last time she felt even remotely normal. The last three months had been mayhem, a chaotic blur of changing species and an unplanned pregnancy. Lately, she'd been to the robotics lab more often than she'd been at work. As she took her apron off at the end of the first week she'd gone back to work full-time, Two began to believe that her life could settle back into a routine.

She sighed, smiled, and tossed her apron onto the armchair.

"Computer, do we have anything planned this weekend?"

The console on the wall blinked into life, showing a mercifully blank calendar. "No, ma'am," he announced.

"Hmmm. Thank you," Two purred. She knew she didn't have long to feel comfortable ‒ she had only just acclimated to being an Energy Vampire, and it would still be a week or two before the pregnancy started taking its toll. She was determined to make the most of this window of opportunity, and her first priority was to demolish the stack of novels on her bedside table.

Not bothering to put on a cloak, she took the first book off the pile and flopped onto the bed in her favorite reading position: laying on her side with her head at the foot of the bed. She snuggled into the velvety blanket and fingered the cover, reading over the dust jacket. She couldn't get into the novel quite yet... she still needed one last thing to make it perfect.

Just as Two started reading the copyright information, Nos-4-a2 hovered into the room. After she turned, he spent a lot of time coaching her through all the changes and new sensory systems, but after they found out about the baby, he made a point of spending every spare moment together. As soon as he felt Two come home, he'd wrap up whatever he was working on and join her in whatever she was doing. Her friends at work thought it was funny that the imposing Energy Vampire was secretively so overbearing, but Two adored every second of his anxious, loving attention.

She could sense a fondness in his electrical signature that warmed her from top to bottom. Neither said a word as he laid down behind her, tucking his arms around her sides and his chin against the top of her head. After everything they'd been through, silent cuddles and reading were the most luxurious things either could imagine. Nos started dozing off almost immediately ‒ he'd been wearing himself ragged, and Two was looking forward to getting him to relax this weekend. She smiled and nuzzled his chin.

 _Now_ she could start reading.


	32. Okay

"Are you okay?" I ask. What kind of question is that? Just something to break the silence? We only got the news yesterday, and neither of us knows how to talk about the fact that she's... that we're going to be... that we're going to have...

Eve looks me dead in the optics. "Are... _you_ okay?"

I squint at her impenetrable expression. "I asked you first."

"But it was a pretty dumb question, don't you think? We're both Energy Vampires now. If we really wanted to know how we felt, we could just focus and see for ourselves, right?"

I let my optics wander. "Of course not... I don't know how you feel any more than I know how I feel."

"You don't know how you feel?"

"Do you know how _you_ feel?"

"No," she frowns.

We fall back into silence. That pretty much sums it up. Maybe we'll be able to wrap our minds around it once she starts to show. She doesn't _look_ pregnant, she doesn't seem pregnant... who knows whether she feels pregnant? I certainly don't feel any more like a father. Based on the fuzz of fleeting emotions whirling around her processors, her motherly instincts aren't really kicking in, either.

My optics settle on the flat surface covering her containment chamber. Right now, the baby is nothing more than swarms of nanobots sorting through data. Next week, we'll go into the lab for the first of many material implants, and the nanobots will start actually designing the motherboard and hard drive. Next week, even though it will just be on the most basic level, our child will physically exist. The world seems to fall away around me.

Whether Eve notices my line of sight or feels the frantic pulse of energy I just released, she reaches out and takes my hand. I scrabble for my composure as I lace my fingers with hers, meeting her eyeforms once again. Her eyeforms... those soft, blue pools of light that make me certain that I know nothing, while still providing me a world of comfort. Seeing her grapple with the same shock, anxiety, confusion, and wonder provides me some relief.

She squeezes my hand and I squeeze hers back. "I think we're going to be okay."


	33. Conference Call

When Two poked her head into Nos-4-a2's office, he was in the middle of a conference call. His optics were already on the door before she entered, though: he felt her electrical signature as soon as she entered the house. He smiled, sending warmth through her circuits, and extended his hand. Two did him one better, sitting in his lap and lacing her arms around his neck. He returned the hug, nuzzling the top of her head as he responded to a question on the call.

Two didn't pay attention to what Nos was saying, only taking in the overlaid tones of his voice, his accent, his timbre. She pressed her visor into the nape of his neck, right where it fit ‒ where it belonged. His hands stroked slowly down her back as he spoke, keeping her close and surrounding her. Two closed her eyeforms. She was home.

Throughout the rest of the call, Nos-4-a2 played with Two's cloak and traced the contours of her metal while flawlessly maintaining his end of the conversation. When he wasn't speaking, he pressed his lips to the top of her head, cherishing the private luxury afforded him by opting out of the video call. He wondered if they could hear his smile or sense any shift in his demeanor ‒ if anyone did, they didn't speak up about it.

He felt like ages passed before the call came to an end. Two lifted her head as everything wrapped up and everyone said their goodbyes, finally culminating in Nos reaching over to the console and pressing a red button to hang up.

"Hey," she purred.

He laughed softly, running his thumb over her cheek. "Hey yourself!" He kissed her visor, "What are you doing home so early?"

She shrugged. "I thought I'd surprise you."

"Mission accomplished. Let me just finish a few things up real quick, then we can go..."

"No, no, you don't have to if you're in the middle of something. I just wanted to see you."

"What a lovely coincidence. I want to see you, too. Give me ten minutes, then maybe we can watch a movie?"

Two smiled. The last few movies they had watched all ended the same way... neither of them were paying enough attention to the screen to notice. "That sounds wonderful, as long as it's no trouble."

"None at all. It'll do me good to step away from this for a while... and I can't think of a better distraction."

"That's what I'm good for," Two laughed.

"Mmm. You're the best distraction I've ever had."


	34. Body Art

"Hey, One, why don't you get something?" Two smiled as they hovered into the design parlor. Two was having the lines on her chest touched up; the last stop for the sisters before they headed home. They had spent the whole day shopping around Balbar, Axiom's largest coastal town.

"What?" One laughed, "You think _I_ should get body art?"

"Why not?" Two cocked her head. She lead One into the waiting area and took out a catalogue, flipping through it to find some of the more subdued designs.

"I mean, I get why you have yours. You and Nos haven't been married long, so wearing that on your chest must be fun, but... I'm somebody's _mother_ ," she laughed again, "I can't just come home with body art!"

"Oh, quit acting like I'm your edgy little sister! We're the same age," Two sneered as she flipped through the catalogue.

"In years only, _little_ sister."

"Come on! How else could you possibly define age?"

"Mentally, emotionally... I mean, while I was starting a family, you ran away from home and ended up married to the first person to kidnap you!" One teased.

"Thanks, 'Somebody's Mother,'" Two rolled her eyeforms. She found the pages she was looking for and showed them to One. "I'm not saying you should get a design as dramatic as mine, but what about something small like this? I know Nos loves mine... I'm going to get some red highlights this time. The last time I got red, he... well..." she blushed and moved on, "Really, I bet Wall.E would love it if you got something."

One looked over the thin, twining patterns that Two showed her, unable to disguise her interest. What was the point in hiding it when Two looked so smug anyway?

"You know..." One admitted, "these little vines _might_ look nice in a pale silver. If I tried something on my wrist and didn't like it, I could just have it removed, right?"

Two smiled wide enough to split her visor.


	35. Cravings

"Alright, darling, if you want something to fill you up, this is sure to do the trick," Nos-4-a2 declared as he handed Two a power cell. He sat next to her at their glass dining table, catching the morning light through the window.

Two weighed the cell in her hands, a hefty black cylinder with a blue label covered in alien writing. "What is it?"

"It's charged with power harvested from a magnetar, a type of neutron star. They're difficult to approach because they release bursts of very high-energy electromagnetic radiation, but that's what makes them so valuable! There are only a few races with the proper technology to collect that energy ‒ these power cells are equally advanced. They're hard to come by, so I've been saving them for a special occasion!"

"What? Breakfast on a Wednesday is _not_ a special occasion!"

"Actually..." Nos put his hand over the curve in her midsection, "It's the perfect occasion."

Two blushed. "You're going to spoil this kid rotten before they ever see the light of day."

"They deserve it," he smiled, "Come on, give it a try! I know it's been hard to charge up since you've been sharing your energy, but this might really help. Tell me what you think."

She placed one finger on the cathode and another on the anode, emitting a power absorption field. She only took it in for a moment before dropping it onto the table with a clatter.

"Whoa! What's the matter?" Nos stammered.

"It's _gross_!" Two blurted.

"Wha ‒ gross? How is that even possible? This is one of the finest forms of energy money can buy!"

"I'm sorry, Nos!" Two couldn't keep in an embarrassed laugh, "Something about that just does _not_ go down right."

"No, no, it's... it's not your fault," Nos picked it up. If Two wasn't going to finish it, he wouldn't let it go to waste. "What can I get for you instead? I don't think we have anything else that you haven't tried before..."

"Well, actually," Two hummed, "you know what sounds really good?"

"What?" Nos cocked his eyebrow.

"Do we have any geothermal power cells?"

"...Geothermal?"

"Yeah. Oh! Or maybe solar?"

Nos-4-a2 stared, his mouth agape. "You're telling me that you'd rather have _solar_ than _magnetar_?"

"Mmm, the more I think about it... solar sounds incredible!"

Nos burst out laughing, and Two couldn't help joining him.


	36. Busy

Two's visor came into focus, registering the texture of the dawn-lit ceiling. She shifted under the weight of the sheets, letting her head fall between the pillows. Her internal chronometer told her she still had a few hours before she had to go to work. As her systems came online, she thought over what she had to do before she left.

 _Finish the landscaping plans for the DeAndrades... refresh the flower vases in the den and dining rooms... call the window washing company... make sure the slugs haven't come back into the vegetable garden..._

Her first and most important task was to work up the determination to get out of bed.

As she rolled toward the edge of the bed, starting to direct power toward her thrusters, a cool hand slid down her side. Two stopped and looked back over her shoulder. Nos's optic had opened just a sliver, casting a dull, scarlet glow.

"Oh, good morning, Nos," she smiled.

He blinked and smiled back, tucking his arm around her. He was still half asleep. His affection rolled over her in sluggish waves, clogging her sensors with warmth, pulling her farther into the comfort of the bed.

"Nos..." she kissed his cheek, "I gotta get up."

He grumbled and pulled her even closer, burying his head against hers. A darker note bloomed into his electrical signature, something coy and sensual even through his sleepiness.

"Come on, seriously," she laughed, "I have a lot to do before I go in today!"

"Is that so?" his accent met her receptors like silk.

"Yes, it is. Or do you want to do my chores for me?"

Nos hummed in amusement, smiling against her metal. His hand wandered thoughtfully over her chest. "What about _my_ plans for this morning?"

"What plans?"

He pressed a slow kiss to her collar, chuckling deep in his throat. His palm trailed up her containment chamber before slowing to rest above her hidden data port.


	37. Desperate Times

Nos-4-a2 wirelessly accessed Two's processors and began his search. It was rare for her to ask him for help like this ‒ the integrity of Two's thoughts was very important to her. He had to be careful to find what was bothering her and soothe it while doing nothing to change it. Of course, it was a weird stretch from his original programming: Nos wasn't controlling her, bending her will, or stealing her thoughts. Out of all the ways he had learned to repurpose his Energy Vampire abilities, easing her mind was by far his favorite.

He sank into her conscience, a vast informational hub, and went to work. It wasn't hard to find the data patterns that translated to anxiety within her processors. After that, he intercepted them, neutralized them, and replaced them with coding that would relax her instead. He didn't solve the problem in her mind, he didn't make her forget what troubled her, he just pruned the needless excess of stress.

Doing so wasn't easy. It took intense focus and energy on his part, but he would always do it when she asked ‒ it meant too much for him to say no. Since Two believed preserving her own thoughts and feelings was so important, she'd only ever ask Nos to alter them in extreme cases. Just the fact that she asked let him know that she was really troubled. He hated seeing her upset, and it meant the world that she trusted him to perform such a delicate operation.

He couldn't imagine a better feeling than the way she relaxed in his arms.


	38. Victory

Two threw her arms around his waist, burying her face in his chest, her eyeforms screwed shut as she hugged him with all of her might.

"Gah! Eve, you'll squeeze the life out of me!" he laughed, "What's gotten into you?"

What _had_ gotten into her? She burrowed into his embrace, his sleek metal, his strong arms, the lilt of his accent, the swell of his electrical signature ‒ everything about him felt like home. She cast around for words to explain... but there were none. She held on with all her might.


	39. Home Alone

Nos and Two hovered in the doorway of the main entrance hall, watching Fletcher, Darwin, and their kids carry their luggage down the gravel path to the street where a shuttle waited to take them to the airport.

"Have a good time!" Nos-4-a2 waved his hand high over his head.

"And take lots of pictures!" Two called.

"We will," Fletcher and Darwin replied in unison for what might have been the twentieth time.

Mel and Toby waved wildly, chattering to one another about what they wanted to do first when they met their friends overseas. Nos and Two watched from the porch as long as it took them to load their luggage into the shuttle, waving until it disappeared past the bend in the road. Nos-4-a2 was the first to turn back inside, pulling one of the grand double-doors shut behind him.

Two closed the other as she followed him. The heavy click of it closing seemed amplified until it died out, leaving only the distant sound of water running in the gardens. The couple stared at each other for a long moment.

"...So," Nos started, a smile tugging the corners of his mouth.

"So." Two nodded.

"It would appear that we're all alone."

She smiled back, fingering the rim of her cloak. "For a whole week."

They grinned at each other like children, drifting closer together. It was the first time they'd had the mansion to themselves since Toby was adopted.

"But what can we do now that we can't do when everyone else is around?" Two said in a mock-thoughtful tone.

The taller Energy Vampire's optics flashed. He knew exactly what she was thinking. "Quinn, cameras off us."

"Gladly, sir."

Two grabbed Nos's hands in a flurry of giggles, dragging him through the entry hall and into the home theater. Nos-4-a2 landed on the squashy sofa and used his wireless control to turn the big screen on while Two grabbed the biggest, softest blanket she could find. They wasted no time stripping down to their bare metal and left their clothes heaped on the floor. Two spun herself into the blanket before landing on top of Nos-4-a2.

"What do you want to watch first?" Nos asked as he waved his hand, scrolling through hundreds of hours of recorded programs.

Two put her hand out and overrode his control, flicking through the titles herself until she landed on a show called _City Hall_.

"We're gonna watch the whole damn thing," she hummed.

"Seriously? I've seen a few episodes, I don't know if I could watch eight seasons straight."

"That's just because you haven't watched it from the beginning! It's really funny, the story is so good and the characters feel so _real_ ‒ "

"Alright already, just start it," he laughed. Two happily flicked her wrist, leafing through to the first episode of season one. They settled into the couch together as the peppy opening music began to play.


	40. Chill

"Thanks so much for coming over to help, Jenny!" Two beamed as she lead her co-worker up the gravel path to the mansion's entrance.

"Of course, Two! I can't expect you to do all that cooking on your own ‒ a proper chef has to be able to taste her dishes," Jenny tittered. She and Two had worked together at Garden Experts for nearly thirty years, ever since Two first applied for a job tending to the nursery. Jenny, who bore a lingering portliness of the space-faring generation before her, was just taller than Two's comfortable hovering height and had skin heavily spotted by the sun. Her pale, bobbed hair was streaked with silver, held back by a green headband that matched her uniform.

"I hope you'll forgive me if the kitchen is a bit reluctant to work with us right away. Quinn hasn't had to power it up in months and the ovens have always been finicky," Two smirked as she typed a code into the keypad next to the double-doors.

Jenny laughed as they stepped inside, but was cut short by a gasp as the doors closed behind them.

"What's wrong?"

"It feels colder in here than it is outside!" Jenny shivered. The high stone walls seemed to radiate chilled air, the warm colors of the rug and the curtains hanging around the glass doors to the courtyard did nothing to bring the temperature up.

"Oh my gosh, I'm sorry! I meant to call Nos and have him warm up house before we got here, it completely slipped my mind. Quinn, would you be a dear?" Two asked in no particular direction. A reluctant groaning of vents started not long after, followed by the whisper of the air conditioning system coming to life.

"Do you _not_ usually warm the house up?"

"Not unless we're having human company, and I have to say it's been a while. I'm sure we'll warm up quick once we get cooking, but again, I'm sorry I forgot!"

"Why on _Earth_ would you want to be so cold?"

Two tried to hide her amusement, not wanting to come off as patronizing. "It's comfortable for us. Don't you know that computers work best in the cold?"

"Well, sure, but don't you have internal cooling systems? Fans and such?"

Two couldn't help laughing then. "Does it make you any more comfortable in the heat just because you sweat?"

"Okay, I see your point, but then why do you wear heavier clothes in the fall and winter?"

"Because the weather gets cold enough to indulge in warmer fashions," Two shrugged as if it were obvious, still smiling.

Jenny laughed then, too. "I guess you learn something new every day! Now, if you don't mind, I'll going to keep my coat on until I stop seeing my breath."


	41. Cooldown

"...Fletcher, you might want to finish your homework in your room."

"What? Why?" the fledgling looked up from his tablet. He had been puzzling over his reading comprehension quiz for over an hour and had sunken deep into the armchair at the end of the coffee table.

"Your mother's about to reach the gate, and it seems she's in a bad mood," Nos mumbled as he rose from his spot on the couch.

Fletcher squinted his eyeforms in concentration, straining his sensors. "I... I can't feel her..."

"No? You will soon. Let's get a move on, I expect she'll be here any minute," Nos began to move about the den, adjusting the thermostat, changing the channel to a music station, turning the lights up.

"But why should _I_ go?" Fletcher grumbled.

Nos stopped fluffing the pillows so he could goad his son out of the air chair. "Trust me, little one, you'll be much more comfortable in your room. She'll need to let some steam off when she comes inside, and I'm sure you'll want to be out of her way. Now go, go!"

Nos straightened out the throw pillow that Fletcher had squashed as the fledgling took off down the bedroom hall. The front door opened, Two's electrical signature strengthening by the second. Nos barely dug the softest blanket out of the basket by the hearth before Two stormed into the room.

"You would not _believe_ the garbage I just had to put up with!"

"Good evening, little dove, let me take that," Nos intercepted her as she veered toward the bedrooms, helping her out of her apron.

"In this day and age, it's disgusting to think there are still people around with a prejudice against robots! They had _no_ problem with my landscaping when we were trading emails, but the _second_ we meet in person ‒ "

"Hey! Hey," Nos took her shoulders in his hands, holding her so they faced each other. Her narrow eyeforms bored into his optics. "Let's get those wings out, release some of that pressure. You're fit to burst."

Two absentmindedly extended her wings, keeping them deactivated. Nos patted her back and steered her into the sofa, pulling the blanket around her back and rubbing it against the bases of her wings.

"I've been working on this project for two weeks!"

"I know, you stayed up all Tuesday night."

"I _know!_ I can't remember the last time I worked so hard ‒ and this... this total _geezer_ comes in and suddenly starts saying everything looks too 'stiff' and 'artificial!' _Artificial!_ A garden!"

"Unbelievable."

"And of course he goes and tries to talk to the manager ‒ get this ‒ _he wanted to talk to the actual designer!_ "

"Surely that didn't go over well?"

"No, Jenny let him have it and turned him away. Dare him to find someone else who'll work with him now though! Jen called all the other landscapers in town and tipped them off. Really, half of us are robots, he'll be lucky to find a place to buy fertilizer from now on. Still... that's so much work that I'm _never_ going to get back!"

"If I weren't under constant watch, I'd track that guy down and _really_ give him something to think about. There isn't another sentient being in any species who could rival your landscaping expertise."

Two had burrowed deep into the blanket by now, curling into Nos's side so her wing folded around his back. He had his arm around her, rubbing the membrane of her other wing between his fingers. Her electrical signature became calmer the longer she spoke, as if Nos were siphoning her agitation away. In truth, he was giving off a calming wavelength of his own to help bring her down.

"That's sweet of you, Nos."

"Now, are you sure you can't repurpose any of this work you've been doing?"

"I mean, it wouldn't be impossible, but his requests were so specific... I'm telling you, from now on I want to meet with my clients in person first!"

"You can keep a picture of me on your desk, too. I can have a nice, intimidating portrait done..."

"I appreciate the sentiment, but let's not get carried away. The last thing we need is for you to violate some part of your reform agreement," Two smirked. Nos grinned back ‒ he had made her smile. Mission accomplished.

"Even if something like that happened, I'm sure we'd find a way out just like before. There's nothing that can get between us Energy Vampires."

A pulse of blue light flashed through Two's cerulean wings. She leaned up so that the base of her visor touched his neck, kindling a static spark against his metal. "Thank you, Nos-4-a2."


	42. Old Valentines

At the end of the day, she really couldn't have been happier to see him.

He looked half asleep, his arms crossed behind his head on a stack of pillows. He was only wearing his button-up and undershirt, the bedroom floor littered with his vest, coat, and cloak. His expressive optic opened a little wider when he saw her, a smile lifting the corners of his mouth.

"Look who it is."

She hovered straight to bed fully clothed, falling onto the mattress so hard that her head made a heavy _clack_ against his shoulder. He didn't react beyond letting his arm fall around her.

Their fingers laced together almost as naturally as their electrical signatures did.

"I got absolutely nothing done today," she sighed.

He squeezed her hand and hummed, "Me neither. Well, except..."

Two smirked. She knew exactly what he was talking about. They had both been in and out of the house all day, but around noon, their freetime overlapped long enough for them to spend a little time together ‒ it was Valentine's Day, after all.

"That shower was easily the best and most productive part of my day."

"Really? I liked the part _after_ we dried off best."

Two gave a short laugh. "Yeah, I guess that wasn't so bad either. Hold on!" she suddenly burst out, "before I forget, you know what I learned today?"

"What?"

Two shifted so that she faced him a little more, though she kept her head tucked under his. "How many 'greats' do you think our greatest gradkid has?"

"Our... greatest grandchild?"

"You know what I mean!"

"I guess, but there must be a better way to phrase that."

"That's not the important part, just guess!"

"Alright, alright. The last time I checked, I think it was... seven?"

Two hoisted herself onto her elbow so she could look Nos in the optics. " _Ten._ "

"You're _kidding._ "

"No! I met them myself today, they treated me like I was some sort of historical figure! Do you know what this means?"

He cocked his eyebrow.

" _We are ancient!_ "

"Now, come on..."

"Nos-4-a2, we are in _textbooks!_ "

"You're making things up."

"What are you talking about? Fletcher showed it to me last week, it's something like _The Modern History of Interstellar Robotics on Earth_. We're only mentioned once, but we're in there. We're in a history book."

"First, that sounds like a totally obscure book, so who cares? Second, wouldn't they have to ask before they published us in it? Is it even legal for me to be published in something like that under the reformation contract?"

"Fletcher okayed us for the book, I think he knew one of the authors or editors or something. Also, it's been over a thousand years, you are literally the _only_ person who cares about that stupid contract any more! Nobody you knew back then is around any more, and I think you've proven yourself. Maybe you haven't noticed, but they haven't interviewed you in like sixty years. The Galactic Alliance has almost been dissolved on several occasions, they have other things to worry about. _That's how old we are._ "

Nos-4-a2 chuckled, wrapping his arms around her. "Excuse me for wanting to make sure I follow all the rules ‒ I don't know what I'd do if they tried to arrest me on some technicality like that. Not now that we have great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandchildren," he counted the greats on his fingers. "Okay. Wow. Maybe we are old."

"That's what I'm telling you," Two laughed.

He buried his head against hers and smiled. "I think we're aging quite well, though."

"Mmm. I think so too."


	43. Garlic

"Master Fletcher, there's an incoming call from the Harley residence."

"Oh, finally! Pick it up!" Fletcher leapt up from his bed, tossing his handheld game onto the pillows so he could hover in front of his holo console. A new window popped into the screen, showing a slightly blurry Darwin standing in the kitchen of his home.

"Hi Fletcher!"

"Hey! What's going on, I thought you were going to come over right after you dropped your stuff off at home?"

"Yeah, sorry, but my mom offered me to give me a ride if I stayed and helped her cook first. I wanted to send you a message, but she said it would be quick..."

"Man, you'd do anything if it meant you didn't have to ride your bike for thirty measly minutes."

"Why waste energy on that when Mom has a nice, air-conditioned car that'll get me there in ten? Besides, she wanted to talk to your parents about something, but that's not why I'm calling. I'm not sure we'll be able to make it at all."

"...Why not?"

"Well, I had to cut up a bunch of ingredients, and I wasn't even thinking about it at the time, but some of it was garlic. I washed my hands as best as I could, but would you all be okay if I still came over? Is it like a serious allergy, or can you just not be around whole garlic?"

Fletcher stared at Darwin for a long, evaluating moment. "...You're kidding, right?"

Darwin's eyeforms fell. "So I can't come over?"

"Oh my god, you're not kidding."

"What?"

"Darwin, vampires aren't real! We're just _called_ vampires, it's the kind of robot we are! Do you think I don't show up in mirrors or pictures? What's the matter with you!"

"Wha ‒ I was being considerate!"

Fletcher burst out laughing. "You're being stupid! Have you thought that we're actually vampires this whole time?"

"What was I _supposed_ to believe? The first time we ever met, you told me you were an Energy Vampire! You mean you can only drain electricity and sense other robots' power signals?"

"Yes!" Fletcher was laughing so hard he could hardly speak, "Is ‒ is this why we took the long way around the church when I walked home with you last week?!"

Darwin suddenly became very interested in the bill of his cap. "Mom just walked out to the garage, I think she's starting the car. I'll see you soon."

The call disconnected while the hybrid was still doubled over in laughter.


	44. Going Out

"Come on, put on something a little nicer. We're going to the library today."

Nos cocked his brow and picked a piece of lint off his shoulder. "What are you talking about? I work in the library every day."

"No, not _our_ library. The big public library in the city," Two explained. She was shuffling through their closet, pulling out a flowy white cloak with blue trim.

"What? Why would we go into the city?"

"Because you've been complaining about getting frustrated and distracted while you work. You need a change of scenery."

"Alright, so how about I just work in a different room? There's no point leaving the house, all my materials are here."

"You have plenty of work to do that doesn't require any materials, you said just last night that you had enough experimental results to go over for a week. Besides, when was the last time you left the house?"

"I don't see what that has to do with anything, but it couldn't have been that long ago."

Two rolled her eyeforms. "Quinn, how long has it been since the last time Nos-4-a2 left?"

"Nearly a month, ma'am."

She gave him a pointed look, but he only scowled back.

"So what?"

"' _So what,_ '" she imitated his accent, now looking through his side of the closet to pick out a different cape. "It's my day off, the city library is only a fifteen minute flight away, and you're going stir crazy without even realizing it."

"Has it not occurred to you that I have a good reason to lay low and avoid public places?"

"Well, see, I don't know if you've noticed, but thanks to One, EVE Probes are pretty well liked. Nobody's going to give you crap if you're with me, and I'm not sure they would anyway. Half the reason Star Command is letting you serve your sentence here is because Earth is so out of the way that no one's likely to recognize you, so stop making excuses and put this on," Two hovered out of the closet with a fine black cloak.

He frowned at her, keeping his arms crossed. "You're being so patronizing I don't think I want to go with you anyway."

Two threw the cloak at his face. "Stop being a baby and enjoy yourself for a change!"


	45. Comfort

Dusk fell quick over the outskirts of Axiom, making the white walls of an isolated mansion gleam with the warmth of the sky. It stood alone in the center of a vast garden, a perfectly secluded haven for its inhabitants. However, only one denizen was home, and he was too preoccupied to appreciate the last of the sunlight that streamed through the windows in the west-facing laboratory.

A tall, angular robot was bent low over one of the workbenches that extended into the cavernous room. With a blaring light shining down from the ceiling, he used a pair of thin instruments to pull apart a power cell the size of a lunch box, his talons perfectly steady. He poured all of his concentration into being as precise as possible, the crosshairs in his round optic focused on his work as he zoomed in all the way. He was mechanically still ‒ one might think he was offline if they saw him from behind. His wrists and hands made perfectly controlled movements, removing casing to expose the components and gently remove them, laying them out on the sterile counter. He meant to rebuild it more efficiently, and after assessing its performance, was finally getting around to breaking it down.

He was so focused on his work that he lost all awareness of his surroundings, meaning that for the first time all week, he didn't sense his wife's electrical signature as she came inside.

A sleek, hovering probe poked her head through the doorway of the lab. She still wore her work apron, a green smock tied tightly enough around her body that it didn't slip down her limbless form. Her floating arms and head drew in as she stifled a giggle, the blue eyeforms in her black visor turning up into a devious smile ‒ with his acute sensory system, it was almost impossible to sneak up on him, and she was going to capitalize on this rare opportunity. Her sense of humor was simple. She was perfectly happy to go in without any gimmicks and simply make him jump.

Moving slowly to muffle the sound of her thrusters, she detached her floating fingers from the ends of her arms and didn't stop until there were only a few inches between them. Smiling wide, she clamped her hands onto his shoulders and stood back as he shot two feet into the air, raising his arms above his head in a reflexive move to avoid damaging the power cell. He stayed frozen until she broke into ringing laughter.

"Wha ‒ _you?_ " he sputtered, twisting around to look at her and blinking to return his vision to normal zoom. His brow drew low over his expressive optic. "Eve Probe Two, you scared me half way to the moon!"

"How could I resist?" she laughed.

"And to think I was sorely missing you earlier," he huffed, floating back down to a comfortable height. His lanky frame still towered over hers. "You know you could've just ruined a whole day's work? They won't be sending me another one of these batteries, they're experimental and highly expensive!"

"Come on, Nos-4-a2, I knew you'd be sharp enough to avoid disaster. You're jumpy as a cat when you're not paying attention, and you have the reflexes, too."

He motioned as if to roll his optic. "You're lucky I love you so much. Come here."

Two happily hovered into his arms, rising higher to nestle the side of her head against his and cross her arms behind his neck. Where she was minimalistic and simple, he was angular and vibrant, but they fit together as comfortable as could be.

"How was your first full week at work?" Nos asked, his accent soft against the side of her head.

"Amazing. It's one of the best nurseries I've ever seen, and their landscaping program is so wonderful, and everyone else who works there really loves it, too! I couldn't have designed a better job if I tried."

"...So you're saying it's time for me to give up on you quitting and staying home with me?"

Two laughed and turned her head to kiss his cheek, kindling a blue arc of electricity against his metal and sending chills through his wires. "I'm afraid so."

He grumbled and leaned his full weight against her. She hummed affectionately and pet his back, easily capable of supporting him.

"You should come in to visit sometime. I was getting to know some of my coworkers today and they're definitely interested in meeting you. I showed them a picture, and I could've slapped the looks off some of their faces. I'd love them to see how sweet you are in person."

Nos scowled. "I'm not sure about that. You're the only one I ever feel sweet around... it's just not in my programming."

"Hey, what have I said about all that 'programming' nonsense?"

"Right, sorry. What I meant is you're the only one I feel comfortable letting myself go around, and even then..."

Two couldn't help laughing, literally holding his completely relaxed frame while she stroked her hand up and down his back. "Yeah, you're a real tough nut to crack."

He huffed again. "Shut up."

She squeezed him and nuzzled the side of her head against his, cherishing the way he felt. For the first time all week, she really realized how much she missed spending her days with him. After all their time together over the last few years, having to be away from him for the larger part of her days felt like eons.

"I'm happy you're home, love."

She blinked static out of her visor. "Me too."


	46. Escapist

The world collapsed, quiet, with the closing of her bedroom doors. The pressing silence of her bubble was welcome, but not celebrated. She was too tired.

Everything here was in place and entirely familiar: the curtains that concealed her from examination, the pattern on the rug over the dark tile floor, the armchairs that faced the flagstone hearth, the darkened sconces, the half-made bed, and the one being she didn't want to hide from. He gave her one look over the work in his lap and nodded in understanding.

She almost seemed to drag herself toward the bed before falling into it, the layers of her cloak billowing around her, weighing her down and keeping her heavily in place. He abandoned whatever he had been doing and folded around her, one more shield, her final layer of protection. She wanted to feel heavy and restrained. She wanted to feel like she wasn't the one in control.

A small voice prickled through her deepest processors. " _Does this make you a coward?_ " She was very good at hiding. She liked it. She loved being able to turn off, to escape, to abandon. It was her terrible pleasure to remove herself from reality, something that gave her more of a feeling of freedom than the wide world of opportunity.

 _You can't reach me here. No matter what, you can't reach me here. You can't reach me._

It was her base pleasure to save herself, to depend on him to shield her, _to not care_. Why didn't she feel any guilt? How much resentment had she collected? Nurtured? She was filled with a distilled, potent calm, smothered by the weight of her own mind in this instance when she wasn't trying to be good for someone else's sake.

 _It only feels so good because you know it won't last._

* * *

 **A/N:** We've all heard about the high of cancelling plans, but what about the high of a well-functioning member of society removing herself from social obligations altogether? The sweet, sweet pleasure of leaving communication behind, only to surround yourself with your most trusted confidant?

Short term solutions. Someone might be getting hurt, but savoring the fact that they don't really need you. You're not obligated to help anyone, you aren't their personal therapist, it's not really your problem.

Then... realizing that you've been hurting. You're lashing out by withdrawing, you're taking sweet satisfaction from the thought that they're struggling without you because you haven't communicated your true feelings. They don't know that they're causing you stress, you don't think you deserve to be stressed considering what they're going through, so nothing is ever said. The tension builds and builds until they ask for too much and suddenly, you're gone, and both of us are so much worse for the wear... and I meet new people, and things start to become normal, but I'm so careful to stay far enough away that nobody counts on me like that again, because I can't afford to be somebody's lifeline...

And I can't judge whether new people can trust me because I've always had a hard time trusting myself, so it's much easier to just go without and stick to what I'm certain won't change by my own faults...

But none of this matters because being somewhere quiet and familiar with someone who understands feels so good that my own morals don't seem to matter so much any more.


	47. Grandbabysitting

Fletcher led Two into Mel's nursery, a room full of pastel colors and streaming sunlight. The door to the balcony, carefully padlocked, was covered in scribbled pictures of trees and animals. The crib against the back wall looked more like a basket of stuffed toys, games littered the colorful carpet, and a short desk next to the holo console on the left held a huge drawing tablet covered in digital finger paintings. Fletcher shuffled around the room, straightening things out as he went. He and Asteri were leaving town for a friend's wedding, Nos-4-a2 was gone on an assessment, and Toby was away at camp, so Two was taking time off work to watch Mel.

"Okay, this is her favorite book, and these at the top of her crib are her favorite stuffed animals. She likes to make sure they all have even amounts of play time, so leave them all exactly the way she does so she can swap them out. This is her favorite movie, and this one always puts her to sleep. Once she falls asleep, make sure to leave this music on ‒ if she wakes up without it, she gets really scared. If she asks for candy, just distract her ‒ she saw Toby eating and thinks all food is 'candy,' and she hasn't learned that she doesn't have a digestive system yet. She can't be convinced so just gently remind her for now and try to give her a brightly colored power cell. Her journal is in the same file as Toby's, so just make sure to record naps, walks, electrical intake ‒ "

"I think I have it, Fletcher," Two grinned.

"But I still need to show you ‒ "

Two took her son by the shoulders. "Honey, I know. I see her every day, and if you'll recall, I raised you, too! You never seemed this worked up when we babysat Toby."

Fletcher frowned. "We never had to leave Toby when he was so young... and Mel is... different."

"Mel's barely a toddler, Fletcher. They can't know that she has any sort of irregularity until she's more stable, but I'm proud of you for worrying so much. The most important thing is that we treat her like she's just a normal kid ‒ which she _is_ ‒ and trust her to let us know how she's feeling."

Fletcher nodded solemnly. "It just scares me when she shuts down... it's like she's afraid of us. I've never met anyone who guards their emissions so carefully."

"You know she loves you, darling, and she's the fifth Energy Vampire _ever_. Of course there hasn't been anyone like her before!"

Fletcher smiled sadly. "...That's what I'm worried about."

Two cupped his cheek. She had to hover a bit higher to look him straight on, but it wasn't an assertive move. Her eyeforms were soft and understanding. "No matter what, you'll love her the same, won't you?"

"Of course."

"That's all she needs! You can trust me to take care of her, too. I'm just excited to spend some time with my grandbaby!"

The hybrid sighed. "Thanks, Mom."

Two smiled and kissed his cheek. "Now, where is she? You need to get going!"

"Yeah, it is getting late... well, come on, Darwin has her downstairs."

They exited the room and followed the hallway to the third floor common room, taking the stairs down to ground level. They crossed the last hall to the den and found Darwin standing next to his and Fletcher's luggage, Mel on one arm and his mobile in his free hand.

"Fletcher! I was about to come find you, the car's going to be here in a few minutes."

"Perfect timing!" Fletcher smiled, coming up to their luggage and lifting a bag over his shoulder.

"Gram!" Mel reached her hands out as Two hovered closer, making Darwin laugh.

"Mellie! Here, dear, I'll take her," Two reached out, but Darwin hesitated. He put his mobile into his back pocket and gave Mel one last hug, nuzzling the top of her head. Mel tucked her arms around Darwin's neck in response.

"I miss you already. Promise you'll be good for Gram?"

"I promise, Daddy!"

Darwin kissed her forehead and handed her over to Two. Mel smiled and put her hands on Two's visor, giggling at how it made the white probe squint.

"We'll call you as soon as we land, alright?" Fletcher lifted the handle of their rolling bag. Darwin nodded, fidgeting as he lifted his carry-on. They seemed to struggle more as they came closer to actually leaving their daughter.

"Don't worry, you can take your time. Try to have some fun! We'll be here all night, right Mellie?"

"Yeah! Can I sleep over with you Gram?"

"That sounds like a lot of fun!" Two laughed, bouncing Mel in her arms to make her giggle again. Darwin relaxed a little bit ‒ at least Mel wasn't stressed about them leaving.

"We'll certainly call to say goodnight," Darwin smiled, stepping close and thumbing away a bit of dirt on Mel's cheek. Two began to hover out of the den toward the main hall, not sure that the couple would make their own way to the front doors. They followed behind her like puppies.

"We'll wait to hear from you then," Two hummed.

"And you can call us whenever you want, too!" Fletcher added, "Just ask Gram for our numbers."

"Yes, even if it's the middle of the night," Darwin agreed.

"Mellie, are your Papa and Daddy being silly?"

"Yes!" the probeling giggled for the sake of calling her parents silly.

They all stopped at the front door. Darwin opened it with his free hand because it was the only thing left to do.

"Won't you at least miss your silly parents?" Fletcher asked.

"Yes! Miss you, Papa."

Fletcher stooped down to kiss Mel's forehead. "Miss you too, little angel. You're going to have a lot of fun here with Gram, though."

She nodded vigorously and bunched her fists in Two's cloak. Fletcher stepped over the threshold, and Darwin swooped in for one last kiss before following him.

"We love you so much, Mel!"

"Love you too, Daddy!" the little robot waved.

Fletcher walked backwards down the gravel path to smile at them as long as he could, his hands too full to wave. They all called out their "goodbyes" and "I love yous" until the couple left hearing range, shrinking toward the gate in the distance.

Two closed the door and looked down at Mel. "Alright. We have this whole place to ourselves, so what do you want to do first?"

Mel's eyeforms opened wide as she considered the world of possibilities. She turned serious before leaning close, cupping her hand to Two's audio receptor. "Can we watch the _good_ cartoons that Papa and Daddy don't like?"

Two pretended to deliberate for a moment. "You know... I think I might be able to allow that _only_ if we make a pillow fort in the theater."

Mel's wings sprung out of her back and gave a few excited flaps as she shrieked in delight.

"You go pull all the pillows off the couches and I'll grab the blankets from the den!"

Two tossed Mel like she was releasing a bird, and the little robot caught the air accordingly before hitting the ground running on her pointed feet. They split at the end of the hall, Mel turning left into the theater and Two turning right toward the den, both filling the house with matching giggles.


	48. Father's Day

"You doing alright?" Two asked in a low voice, putting her hand on Nos's elbow.

"Oh, yes, I'm fine. Just came out to enjoy a bit of quiet," the Energy Vampire smiled. They were hovering on the patio outside the Earthclasses' living room, looking out at the city lights sparkling off the lake. Small boats slipped over the glassy surface, emanating distant music and laughter.

Wall.E and One had built their house on the same spot that the truck once stood, perched at the top of a fortified bridge extending over the water. It was made with a similar style to the towering residential buildings on the shore, with pale stucco walls, red tile roofs, and high, arched windows. The inside was decorated with the best of Wall.E's collection, flowers growing out of anything that could hold dirt, with even more plant life spilling out of hanging planters. Somehow, as eclectic as it was, the place could never be called "messy." The Earthclasses managed to maintain enough order to host parties such as the one currently underway, a celebration of the third Sunday of June, Father's Day. The patio where Nos and Two stood was floored with tiles made to look like wood, a glass table with six chairs to one side and a couple overstuffed sofas under an awning to the other, fairy lights illuminating the whole area from above. The coffee table between the sofas was littered with glasses and plates from the human guests who had been out to watch the sunset, some detritus even sitting on the edges of planters filled with colorful succulents.

"You don't always have to follow me when I disappear at parties, you know. I'd rather you catch up with your friends than sit alone with me."

"Has it ever occurred to you that I might be disappearing as well?" Two chuckled, leaning against his side. "It always gets a little crazy after Mary's third glass of wine, anyway."

Nos gave a short hiss of amusement, putting his arm around her shoulders. "I thought that was half the fun of having parties with humans!"

"I mean, sure, but some of the 'bots from the _Axiom_ get a little too into it. You should've seen the look on poor Michael's face when Mary started singing and L-T let her use them as a microphone!"

"Oh, is _that_ why everyone went inside?" Nos smirked.

"No, no, I think they started opening presents. That's actually part of why I came out here... I figured it was a good time to slip away without anyone noticing."

"Well, shouldn't at least one of us be there to see Wall.E open the gift we got him?"

"Eh," Two shrugged, "we'll get a thank you note either way. I was thinking we might go home soon, anyway... I'm beat."

Nos-4-a2 hummed and squeezed her side, his hand trailing down to the front of her containment chamber. "You are feeling a bit low. We need to be more careful. It's not good for your energy to fluctuate now that we have a third party to consider."

Two smiled and laced her fingers with his. She had only been pregnant for a month and hadn't started to show it yet, but things were already changing. The nanobots were hard at work processing information and starting to build components; she wasn't used to how fast it sapped her energy. "The baby's probably just a speck at this point... I don't know how it's managing to drain me like this!"

Nos grinned and kissed the top of Two's head. "We must have a little vampire on our hands."

Two's eyeforms swelled. "Oh wow, I never thought of that..."

"Well, it would make sense. You only became pregnant after you turned."

"Wow..." Two whispered again, "I wonder if Patrick's thought of that."

"Something tells me he would have talked to us about it by now if he had. The man's a fanatic... I'm sure he'd have some input about it if we asked him at your next check-up, though."

Two grumbled and pressed her head into Nos's chest. "I can practically hear the excitement in his voice now. Honestly... just thinking about his high energy is exhausting."

"Well, we don't need to worry about that now. Let's enjoy the view for a bit, just until they're done with presents. We can say goodbye to everyone after that, and then I'll carry you home."

" _Really?_ " Two beamed.

"Of course," Nos smiled back, "we can't have you exerting yourself too much! You always make it a race, and I don't think high speed chases are good for the baby's development."

"I only make it a race because you constantly drag behind," Two scoffed.

"Oh, is that so?" the tall robot drawled, "Then maybe it would be faster to fly yourself home after all!"

"No! I mean ‒ I guess I can put up with it for now."

Nos laughed and rolled his optic, leaning forward against the railing and rubbing the dip in Two's side. It was truly a spectacular view, and the cool breeze rolling off the water made the scene all the nicer. Two relaxed against him and watched the patterns in the water, the waves far below lapping steadily towards the shore. Sometimes it moved as the wake of a boat or the ripples from a fish breaching the surface, but it still seemed regular, mathematical. Two had to catch herself to stop from drifting off, so comfortable under her husband's touch, surrounded by the muffled sound of celebration and chattering behind them and distant music from passing boats. She fantasized about the soft bed waiting for them at home, cuddling into Nos-4-a2's metal and sleeping the night away. Two actually started to doze off when one of the french doors that led to the patio opened wide, bursting with the sound of the party.

"Oh! Dad, I found him!"

Nos and Two looked back to greet Willow, who floated over the threshold with her father making his way through the crowd behind her. Some people watched Wall.E curiously, but most were so invested in their current conversations that they just squeezed out of the way to let him through. He had to turn sideways and shuffle on his treads to make it past some of the tighter spots, but he eventually made it through the door and out to the patio.

"Thanks, Willow. Could you tell Momma we need her out here?"

Willow nodded and darted off, hovering over the crowd to find One.

"Sorry, were you looking for me? I didn't mean to be hard to find," Nos turned fully away from the railing to face Wall.E. The short compactor sported a fresh coat of yellow paint and a vividly patterned bowtie around his neck, gifts from his wife and daughter respectively.

"No, it's fine! Better that we're outside," Wall.E looked back over his shoulder to make sure they weren't being listened to, dropping his voice, "We know you haven't told everybody you're expecting yet, but we got you something for Father's Day."

"What? You really didn't have to, we ‒ we hardly told you a week ago! How'd you have the time? Besides, I'm not a father yet," Nos-4-a2 stammered.

Wall.E's optics lifted, the covers of his lenses conveying a grin. "Then happy 'Almost-a-Father's Day.' Come sit down, nobody will be able to see us over here..."

Nos and Two followed Wall.E to the sofas, taking seats across from him. One came outside almost immediately after with a package in her hands, Willow following and making sure the door shut behind them.

"Oh, good! I was worried you'd left," One smiled.

"Without saying goodbye? Come on," Two laughed, shaking her head.

"I've been distracted! But it doesn't matter. Here," she handed the package to Nos before hovering back to lean on the sofa, absentmindedly taking Wall.E's hand while Willow bounced onto the cushion next to her dad.

"This is really too kind. What could you possibly have gotten me though?"

"The point is to open it and find out," Willow snickered.

Nos smirked, "All right, smart aleck."

The package didn't have a bow, simply wrapped in blue and white striped paper. Nos used his talons to tear it away and reveal a book with hard-backed binding in a featureless, deep green. The book was light and wider than it was tall, a silk ribbon lining the spine.

"It's beautiful," Two murmured, leaning over Nos's side.

"Open it up!" One gestured, giddy.

Nos lifted the cover, still not sure what to expect, and found it was a scrapbook entirely empty besides a single, official looking image of white coding on a black backdrop with a date stamp along the bottom from the previous month. The Energy Vampire's expressive optic opened as wide as it could. Under the picture was a handwritten caption: "Baby's first line of code."

His voice was hardly louder than a whisper. "Is this...?"

"It's a baby book," Wall.E answered.

With Nos and Two still staring, awestruck, One continued, "I visited Patrick at work the day after you told us the news. When I asked him if he could give us anything we could put into a baby book for you, he printed this off right away and told me it was the first sign he had that Two was pregnant. What do you think?"

Nos-4-a2's smile stretched all the way across his face, his silver fangs glittering under the fairy lights. "I... this is the most thoughtful gift I've ever received... thank you!"

Two nodded vigorously, covering the base of her visor in her hands, keeping herself from speaking in case she started to cry.

"Oh, I'm so glad you like it!" One chirped.

"Of course," Nos traced the jumble of characters on the paper with the pad of his finger, trying to hide the fact that he had oil building in his optic.

"We know your baby isn't here yet, but that doesn't make them any less real. If you ever need anything, advice, planning, whatever you can think of, we hope you'll come to us," Wall.E nodded.

Nos could only bring himself to say "thank you" again, lacing his arm around Two and hugging her to his side. One, unable to contain herself at having elicited an emotional response from Nos-4-a2, hovered forward to hug him as well.

"Happy Father's Day, Nos!"

* * *

 **A/N:** Obviously, I would have preferred to post this yesterday, but I was distracted at a huge Father's Day celebration with my own clan! I probably could have had it done if I had just written what I had originally planned, a super short story where Two woke Nos up with a fancy power cell and a kiss for Nos's "first" Father's Day after she's pregnant, but I'm trying to expand my scenery a little. I don't know if it's as obvious to you guys as it is to me, but a LOT of my stories happen while the characters are either waking up or getting into bed. I guess one of my greatest fantasies is just being cozy...

Headcanon: The rogue robots, the Ratzenbergers (John, Mary, and their immediate families), the Earthclasses, and the Energy Vampires are all basically one big family who gets together for every little occasion. Others, including but not limited to the McCreas and the Henrys, are considered part of the extended family and always make it to at least one gathering a year, usually Christmas.

Also, for the Earthclasses' house, I decided to create a description based on a shot from the end credits of _Wall.E_. I know it shows the truck on the end of the bridge, but this is already a crossover AU... so I don't feel too bad twisting the canon a little. Wall.E and One are grown adults with a growing family who need a roomy house! They keep all the knick-knacks they couldn't fit into the decor in a storage unit and the truck itself is kept as a historical monument in a local museum.


	49. New

He surrounded her, pressing into her with a comfortable, lazy weight as her processors began to come online. He was awake ‒ she could tell that much by the pace of the nearly-silent clicking and humming within his metal. He seemed to have wrapped himself around her for comfort's sake. Her head was tucked completely against his chest, the blue at the base of his neck just barely visible. His hands rested on her back, fingers slowly rubbing against her metal as he felt her come out of sleep mode.

She didn't know how to properly express how she felt. A smile seemed too little, it wasn't enough when this was so new, when she wasn't quite used to waking up with him, her husband, in their house, their _own_ house, safe on Earth. She wrapped one of her arms around his back so her hand was on his shoulder.

"Good morning, my love," he whispered. His accent dripped, cool and soothing, through her processors.

Groggy and gushing, Two responded by nuzzling her visor into his shoulder and pressing a kiss to the seam where blue met red at the base of his neck. Nos sucked a shuddering breath into his ventilation system... _that_ was different. He drew closer around her, his palms pressing into her back.

"Do... do that again?" his voice rumbled so close to her audio receptors.

She couldn't help a little laugh. This was new, too, wielding some power over the Energy Vampire. She let her visor graze over his metal again before starting another arc of blue-white static against his neck, making this one last longer. He shivered around her and held her tighter.

"Good morning to you, too, Nos," she purred.

He flexed his shoulders a little, lifting her higher and pulling his head back so they could look at each other. The amber glow of his optics filled her with warmth, made her mind work more sluggishly, driving her fingers to trail over the sensitive spot on his neck. His lid dropped lower over his expressive lense as he leaned his head forward to press his lips right between her eyeforms. She could feel the shape of his smile.

Would she ever grow used to this? Would she ever really be able to fathom how much she loved him? Pondering failed her, so she kissed him again, holding him close, sinking into hours of getting to cherish him in private, just as she had yesterday morning, and just as she would tomorrow.


	50. Wear and Tear

Nos-4-a2 was hardly online, just as it always went after he slept on a depleted battery. He winced groggily ‒ he was sore for the same reason he had so little power, but he didn't have the energy to think about it. He rolled out of bed with nothing but a dull drive to sooth the burning hunger programmed into the back of his throat, blind to the world, unconsciously floating through the halls and hardly avoiding the walls on the way to the kitchen. He wanted nothing more than to sate his craving for electricity.

He wasn't the only one.

Nos stopped short as he crossed over the threshold of the kitchen, finding Two floating up at the highest shelves, sluggishly digging around the bigger power cells. He couldn't help but stare ‒ the thin, clear coating over her metal was marked with nicks and scratches, some of it even breaking down through the polish to expose thin lines of silver metal. A few dents had the distinctive spacing of his fangs. Flashes of the previous night bubbled through his processors, pulling a grin across his face.

"You look like hell."

Two glanced over her shoulder, blinking slowly before she resumed shuffling through the pantry. He caught a smile. "Guess you haven't looked in a mirror yet."

Nos didn't need to look ‒ along with the soreness, he could feel a telling reluctance in the motors of his neck and shoulders. There was a good chance he had gotten off even worse than she had, especially considering he wasn't made of such sturdy stuff. He drifted across the room and leaned into her. She was hovering so high that he didn't have to bend down to nuzzle his face between the wing ports in her back, pressing his lips against a particularly deep cut.

"Little dove, would you mind grabbing me an ‒ "

" ‒ antimatter battery?" Two finished his thought, taking one of the heavy cells from the shelf. "I was going to bring it and surprise you with breakfast in bed, but you were so drained I should have known you'd be up early to get something..."

Nos hummed in appreciation and hugged her around the middle. "We could do breakfast in bed anyway."

Two picked out a solar charged cell before sinking down, turning in Nos's arms. "Actually, it is a pretty serious mess in there... maybe we'd be better off eating somewhere else?"

He tilted his head. "Like where?"

Two smiled and kissed his cheek. "The repair room, maybe?"

"Shouldn't we wait for later in the day before we put Quinn through that?" Nos snickered.

"Well, unlike _you_ , I actually have somewhere to be in a few hours. I'd rather not have to wear all your love marks when I meet my clients..."

"But you wear them so well!"

Two rolled her eyeforms.

"How am I supposed to help myself?" Nos cooed as he let his hands slide down her blemished back, "Those damned assessments always make me miss you, I can't help being a bit... overzealous when I get to see you again."

"You know I'd never complain about that, it's just that I'd rather keep it between us. I'm embarrassed to have Quinn do our repairs as it is."

"I could give it another try..."

"I appreciate it, but I can't have uneven patches of off-color polish again, it's almost more noticeable than the love marks on their own," Two blushed.

"Oh... right."

Two laughed again and held out his breakfast. "Here, you need this before your long term memory expires."

"Or..." he wrapped his talons around the battery and lowered it, "you could eat breakfast and I could enjoy some more of you?"

"Nos, I told you I have places to be today." Two pressed the power cell firmly into his face.

His brow drew low over his expressive optic as he took the battery and sank his fangs into it, trying not to show how much relief it brought him. Two smiled knowingly and pet his cheek.

"How about I wear one of my more concealing cloaks today and just clean up what shows? Would it make you happier to know I'm wearing you to work anyway?"

Nos smiled and drank deeply from his cell before licking his lips. "You always know just how to cheer me up."

"Yeah, well..." she shrugged and shook her head, "It'll really just save us all time tomorrow morning. You obviously didn't get it out of your system last night and I don't want to spend all this morning fixing what we'll only be tearing up again tonight."

Nos's face split into a twisted grin. "You spoil me rotten, little dove!"


	51. The Whole World

As much as he'd have her believe otherwise, Nos-4-a2's work was far from easy. All the testing and formulating it took to design power cells could frustrate him to no end when things didn't happen as he thought they should. It was the hallmark of science: more often than not, things seemed to go exactly wrong, and his job was to find the source of the problem. For the times when the stress outweighed the reward of solving problems, he tried to keep his anger confined to the laboratory. Some cases, however, were too time sensitive to leave behind.

As a movie played on the large holoscreen in the den, Nos typed away at a simulator on his tablet while Two sat next to him, bundled in a thick blanket and trying to pay attention to the scene. It was difficult over the Energy Vampire's distracted grumbling, but Two knew he was too far gone to notice he was doing it. She rolled her eyeforms.

"Hey, Nos."

He hammered at his tablet a few times before giving a noncommittal grunt to let her know he'd heard her.

Good enough. "Did you know that I can fit the entire world in my hands?"

He still hadn't looked up. He might not have registered what she said, but his movements came to a halt when her white, petal-like fingers cupped the sides of his face.

"What's this now?" he seemed to blink out of a trance.

"I said, did you know that I can fit the entire world in my hands?"

As she repeated it, her thumbs trailed comfortably over his cheeks where a static blush had begun to accumulate.

"My Eve, I didn't know there was any room for growth, but that's by far the cheesiest thing you've ever said."

Two laughed and squished his face before pulling it down so she could kiss his forehead. "I just want you to relax, okay? Wouldn't it be easier if you stepped away from the problem so you could try again later with a fresh perspective?"

"I'd love to, but I have to have this ready to submit by tomorrow morning. Thank you, though, I appreciate you cheering me up." His whole face seemed to soften as he smiled.

Two gave his cheek a quick pat before letting go. "Anything for you, dear."


	52. Decorating

As they got on in years, Fletcher and Darwin were as comfortable in each other's homes as they were in their own. Fletcher had simply moved from the room next to his parents' to the master suite two floors above them (the older he got, the more sensitive he became to their affection on the other side of the wall ‒ and the less comfortable he grew having guests over to stay the night in such close quarters). Darwin had moved from his parents' house into an apartment of his own about half way up a skyscraper. In the center of Axiom's capital, it had a view of the bustling livelihood that never reached the Energy Vampires' mansion. Fletcher and Darwin moved effortlessly from place to place until they each had a dedicated guest room ‒ quite a feat in Fletcher's case as Darwin's apartment only had two bedrooms including his own.

Come the first week of December, it was tradition for Fletcher to spend a week or so at Darwin's place. Christmas was a serious production at the Energy Vampire household. Nos-4-a2's competitive streak lived through his determination to outdo the neighbors' holiday light displays, something that only became more elaborate by the year. Two took charge indoors, bringing in trees as tall as could fit and decorating them with Quinn's assistance. The veritable construction zone made for difficult living. Fletcher helped here and there and usually took care of the third floor common area outside his room, but it was generally easier for him to stay with Darwin until the madness subsided.

Darwin's apartment was modest. The front door opened into the living room, a sectional taking up most of the wall to the right, directly across from a holographic screen on the wall to the left. A door on either side of the screen led into each of the two bedrooms, while past the sectional to the right were a kitchenette and a bathroom. The wall directly across from the front door at the other end of the apartment had a door that lead out to the balcony and a broad window.

Since there was already a full dresser of his clothes in Darwin's guest room, Fletcher brought a bag with nothing but power cells and his personal computer. His visit always started on a Saturday: he and Darwin spent the whole day dragging out about an hour's worth of work, messing around, dressing in elaborate sweaters and hats, and watching movies in the midst of decorating the apartment.

This year, Darwin brought in a scraggly, four-foot tree to shove in the corner of the living room, burying it in tinsel and lights. He didn't have many ornaments, as their favored way of hanging them was by throwing them at the boughs to see what stuck. Only the strongest survived. Fletcher took care of lighting the balcony, flying out over the edge and wrapping the bars of the gate in red, white, and green. Sometimes he'd help the neighbors as well ‒ on one occasion, this had earned him a night in someone else's place. Baubles hung from the ceiling, more lights were strung along the tops of the walls, and the ugliest novelty Santa figurines posed in clusters on every open surface. The normal throw pillows and blankets were replaced with a strange mix of treasured, hand-embroidered pillows and gaudy designs with crude puns or over-the-top tartan patterns.

The best part of the day came after darkness fell. Fletcher rustled through his bag at the small dining table while previews rolled into an old Christmas movie. Darwin straightened out the last few tchotchkes before nodding.

"Are you ready?"

"Hold on," Fletcher mumbled. He dug into the bottom of his bag before pulling out a fist-sized battery with a hand marked label. He grinned and hopped over the part of the sectional that separated the living room from the kitchenette, sprawling out across the cushions. "Ready!"

Darwin walked toward the front door and turned off one light switch, leaving the room lit by nothing but their eyeforms and the light of the movie. With the click of another switch, the festive lights came to life.

"Mag _nificent!_ " Fletcher grinned as he stared up at the ceiling.

Darwin stepped around the coffee table between the sectional and the holoscreen. "Come on, make room."

Fletcher grumbled and sat up enough for Darwin to sit and kick his feet up on the coffee table before landing his head back in his lap.

"To the best year yet," the Energy Vampire saluted with his power cell before sinking his fangs into it and taking a long, slow drag.

Darwin recognized the handwriting on the label as Fletcher's ‒ it must have been a relaxant. Fletcher's eyeforms became fuzzy around the edges, his joints became looser, and he lowered the cell from his mouth with a sigh.

"Man, that's just not fair. Don't you feel any shame?"

"Can't feel shamed," Fletcher beamed and shook the cell. "Guess I'll just have to turn you."

"Once it's painless, hit me up. It'd be worth it for the relaxant alone."

Fletcher laughed and bit into the cell again, turning his gaze toward the movie as it started. Darwin picked up the tassel on the end of Fletcher's Santa hat, rubbing it between his fingers and looking at the Christmas lights reflecting off his metal. Fletcher hadn't taken power in a few hours, and judging by the drooping shape of his purple eyeforms, it wouldn't be long until he dozed off. He prefered drowsiness when he could help it, indulging in the warmth, though he never lasted long.

"Well, thanks again. I think this is the best my place has ever looked."

"You know I love doing this. I look forward to this all year."

"Me too," Darwin smiled.

"What do you think the best part is?" Fletcher asked.

Darwin thought for a minute. "There's nothing I don't like about it. Everyone's just... happier? For the most part. I know it sounds dumb, but it's almost like the only time of year people really take me seriously. I rarely ever get the, 'what are you trying to get by being nice to me?' look. Gift exchanges... especially white elephants are the best. It kinda... recharges me. I get through the rest of the year because of the energy from Christmas."

"Darwin, people should trust you all year. You're the best... guy. You've never got motives," Fletcher spoke with the relaxant still in his mouth. Darwin snorted at how fast Fletcher's mental processing dulled.

"What's your favorite part of Christmas?" Darwin hummed. He pulled Fletcher's hat off and he hardly seemed to notice.

"I guess... when I was a kid... there was a lot of the world that I didn't need to explain, y'know? It was just _magic._ I liked figuring things out, made me feel like a magician if I could know the secrets. Christmas... even after I figured Santa wasn't real, there was a lingering magic that I couldn't touch. It's a quiet sort of... thing. I still feel it now. When I'm going to bed alone after spending time with family, and it's all dark, but I look out the window and I can see the tops of the trees kinda glowing warm because of the Christmas lights... or when I'm the first up and everything isn't moving, and the timers haven't turned off yet for the tree lights. And the _snow_. The _Christmas_ snow is better than the normal snow. 'N I love the Christmas Eve party better than my own birthday..."

Fletcher's words started to melt together as Darwin pet his head. They kept speaking and exchanging little joys as long as Fletcher was conscious. It was nothing new. They could have recited each other's answers, they knew everything there was to know about one another, but it was always the warmest conversation, especially when Fletcher was half asleep and without his wits. When he finally dozed off, it was almost mid-sentence. Darwin covered him in a knit blanket and watched the rest of the movie, savoring the comfortable weight of Fletcher's head in his lap before going offline himself.

In truth, there was nothing he loved more than this.


	53. Crabby

"Hey, uh, Wall.E? Could you get that?" One called as a tone rang from the video console. She was arranging an elaborate bouquet on the coffee table in the middle of their living room, fluttering around to straighten things out. She was in preparation mode and had even coaxed Willow into helping.

Wall.E smiled and nodded, treading across the room to answer it. The screen flickered to life with a video feed of a tall, angular robot in a deep purple cloak.

"Nos-4-a2! How are you?"

"I am well, thank you, but I'm afraid I have bad news. We're not going to be able to make it to the party tonight."

One looked up from her flowers. "Is everything alright?"

"No need to worry, Two's just feeling a bit under the weather."

" _That's one way to put it, asshole._ "

Nos-4-a2 gave a nervous laugh. "Willow is in the room, love."

The short hybrid turned to the screen, realizing she was in the shot. She shuffled to the side and giggled, "I don't mind, Aunt Two!"

One gave her a pointed look and Willow put up her hands in surrender.

"So what happened?"

"Well, despite the fact that Eve ‒ sorry, Two ‒ has been given a doctor's order to take it easy until the baby comes, she insists on working in the garden. She's simply overexerted herself."

" _This is_ your _fault! Admit it, coward!_ "

"Quinn is taking care of her repairs, but she needs to rest and run diagnostics tonight."

" _I'm fine you dick!_ "

Nos winced and turned around. "Eve, please! Language."

" _That's not what you said last night ‒_ "

"OKAY!" Nos whipped back toward the screen, a frantic smile on his face. "Terribly sorry to have to cancel at the last second, give everyone the best from us, we'll see you again soon!"

The video feed cut out. Wall.E blinked, shook his head and laughed. "Would it be terrible to say I'm relieved?"

One laughed as well. "I remember being where Two is now. I'd move heaven and Earth for her, but I can hardly stand being around her like this! I was never that bad when I was carrying Willow."

Wall.E made a noise almost like a cough. Willow looked between them before skirting out of the room.

"What does that mean?"

"No, Evah, it's nothing..."

"Wall.E."

"I have nothing but respect for you bringing our child into this world and have vowed to stand by every death threat you made during your pregnancy, including the ones against me."

" _Wall.E!_ "


	54. Half an Hour

Half an hour. Half an hour until he had to get dressed and leave. He was becoming spoiled working from home. His days in the lab, grueling and satisfying, passed in the comfort of doing so as he pleased in the sanctuary of his own lair. Dealing with people face to face was an ugly, rare, and unavoidable necessity.

But that wasn't for another half hour.

Half an hour of drawing the curtains, curling together under heavy sheets, and stepping away from the stress for just a moment before he had to go. Half an hour of slow, drowsy kisses in their private chambers, dancing on the edge of a nap. Half an hour of her familiar electrical signature saturating his sensors, the distilled feeling of home and safety. Fingers laced, optics deactivated, and a pressing, weighty silence. He could face anything after that half hour.


	55. What Makes a Home

"Have you ever wanted to travel off Earth?"

Two cocked her head. She and Nos were lying on the floor of their observatory, the tops of their heads together. They had been stargazing in silence.

"Well, I... don't actually know."

"How's that?"

"We hadn't made contact with other intelligent life until the war, so it's not something a lot of people thought about. After the war, everyone was mostly focused on rebuilding, but since we were being annexed into the Galactic Alliance, space travel was sort of... _provided?_ That's a weird way to put it; it was just suddenly accessible. I know I left, but... I wouldn't say it was because I wanted to. I hated pretty much every moment I spent away from Earth up until... well, you know. But I hated Earth then, too."

Nos hummed. "Life wasn't fair to you. There are a lot of worlds out there that you'd really enjoy. I've been thinking about it lately, and... I haven't been comfortable with this before, but it's not right. If you ever want to travel off planet, I hope you will. There are so many incredible places to visit and explore and I want you to live your fullest life. I don't want you to stay here just because I have to."

Two reached up, feeling from the top of Nos's head down to his cheeks and holding his face. "That's dumb."

He huffed and she felt him frown. "Thanks."

"If I wanted to go, I would. The reason I haven't is because I don't want to." She shifted, letting go of his face so she could roll onto her front, propping herself up so she looked down at him. "I love my gardens, my home, my family. My job is perfect, my friends are great. I love everything about my life. And ‒ " she planted an upside-down kiss on his lips " ‒ you're an integral part of all that. I appreciate the thought, but I'd never go somewhere you couldn't follow, Nos-4-a2."

Nos stared up at her. He held her gaze for a while before reaching up and guiding her face down toward his. Why did he ever worry about her? She laughed and held his face again, melting into something longer, slower, warmer. He'd never heard anything so humbling ‒ he couldn't imagine a better life sentence.

* * *

 **A/N:** This... is uncalled for... but I kept having this thought when I was writing this and I wanted to draw a quick sketch to post along with it! However, I'm in Chicago at the moment and can't drum up the motivation, so I'll leave you with this:

Years later, Nos-4-a2 would think about this moment while sitting in his wife's gardens under the cool shade of a wisteria tree, gently brushing errant petals off the headstone and speaking softly because he knew that even if she wasn't with him, she never meant to leave him behind.


	56. Exclusive

Darwin thought long and hard before coming to the conclusion that he might never figure it out.

The holographic screen flickered, casting cool light throughout his living room. Really, this was no different than the hundreds, maybe thousands of times they'd done it before. After a long day of doing nothing in particular, Fletcher had fallen asleep against Darwin, his head on his chest.

They'd been dating for a while but had only become "official" a few weeks ago, and Darwin still couldn't quite put his finger on what was different. Fletcher was an easy weight against his side just as he always was. The flat top of his head reflected the screen in flashes. Darwin palmed the dark blue metal, spreading out his fingers. When Fletcher didn't stir, he started sweeping his fingertips back and forth softly, slowly. He might have done this before, but something now felt _fuller_ inside of him. Something was just different.

Going from best friends to boyfriends didn't do much when they had always been rather intimate. Ever since they were little kids, they were more than comfortable with physical contact, both being cuddlers by nature, and had even been each other's first kiss. There had been nothing romantic about that though ‒ it was just to get rid of the pressure of having the perfect first kiss. They could trust each other with that and anything else.

Then, when they were out of school and had started working together at the ARL, there had been a time when Darwin's feelings leaned toward the romantic. Back then, he'd imagined something like this. The closeness and comfort that they'd always shared, but with a slightly different spin. Not that it would've worked. Fletcher never had much of a connection between physical and emotional closeness, and had no desire for romantic relationships at the time. Besides, when Darwin really thought about it, his feelings then may have had more to do with _too_ strong of a connection between physical and emotional relationships. If they had gotten together, there was no telling how it would have turned out, but Darwin couldn't picture it ending well. They both needed time to grow. Maybe they'd been growing into each other this whole time. He'd had many long term relationships over the years, and there was no doubt in his mind that he needed to have them to change into the person he was today, but... did that mean he'd been waiting for Fletcher this whole time?

The program on the screen had gone to commercial break, leading to particularly loud ad that made Darwin jump. Fletcher flinched as well, his eyeforms flickering open.

"Oh, hey, you alright?"

The Energy Vampire only mumbled, curling up a little and drifting right back into sleep mode. Darwin smiled and nuzzled his chin down against the top of Fletcher's head. Fletcher had changed just as much as he had. Maybe that was all there was to it. Everything in their lives, everything they'd endured and survived had lead up to two people who could make each other happy. Darwin had never felt as close to anyone as he'd been with Fletcher, and a lifetime of shared vulnerabilities had already made them committed to one another. Now, though, it was exclusive.

Could that have been it? It seemed like such a simple detail, and almost selfish, but it sure gave Darwin a rush. Thinking that he was the only one right now who could... he blushed, hesitated, and tilted his head down to kindle a soft spark against Fletcher's forehead. Something like a smile flickered across the dozing hybrid's lips, though his optics didn't open. Everything in Darwin seemed to melt when Fletcher sighed a half-conscious, " _Mmmn... Win._ "

Darwin might have floated away, so he tucked his arm around Fletcher's waist and murmured, "I love you."

A flash of purple lit the Energy Vampire's visor as he snapped to attention, eyeforms wide. "What?"

They stared at each other for a while before Darwin laughed. "I love you."

"Thank god," Fletcher buried his face in the android's chest, "I didn't want to be the first one to say it since I sprung this on you in the first place. I love you, too."

"Fletch, we've said it a million times before!"

"Yeah, but not since we've been boyfriends."

"I mean... I hope you don't think this is weird, but I've loved you the whole time anyway."

"Sure, but you don't think it's different now?"

Darwin slouched, grinning. It was good to know they were on the same page. "Of course it is, but there's just the one word for it, so."

"I guess," Fletcher stifled a yawn, "We should come up with a new one."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," his eyeforms were already falling again, "'I love you' is so normal. We need something... special. I'm devotulated to you."

Darwin laughed again. "Devotulated? You're obviously not all here, I know you could think of something better than that."

Fletcher grumbled. "I'm tired, what do you want? I have another idea though. Maybe we could say 'I love you,' but it's like a... a secret code. We'll know what it really means even if it sounds normal."

"So instead of 'I love you,' we say 'I love you?'"

"Just like that," Fletcher's words began to trail off. He was hardly hanging on.

"Sounds good, Fletch. You're a real innovator."

Fletcher slipped back offline with a smile on his face. Darwin would carry him to bed later, but for now he'd let him rest, his mind filled with happy nothings to keep him company.


	57. Here We Are

Two was hesitant to believe that things were going so well. They had worked hard and gone through hell, but nothing had really worked out like this for her before. The honeymoon seemed like a dream, a few weeks of no worries, bliss, preparation, hope. She'd had periods like that in her life before, but she didn't put much faith in making plans. That had never really turned out well for her before.

The honeymoon ended and they went to the real world, but... things were fine. They stayed with her sister while they built their house, the place that was going to be their home ‒ that was hard to accept. She didn't know where all his optimism came from, but she loved seeing him like this, so she didn't dare question it. He made plans for his work, plans for what he could do in his freetime, plans for their whole lives. She listened and it made her feel lighter, but she wasn't sure if she ever really believed any of it. Every morning when she booted up, there was a tension to her, and she had to remember where she was and how much danger she was in. She kept waking up next to her husband in total safety. She kept meeting her sister, her brother in law, her niece. She connected with old friends and met new ones, she explored the town and the wastelands on her own, and... she didn't have to be on guard.

Their house was completed and they moved in, Nos got to work almost immediately thanks to the high demand for alien technology. He was enjoying himself, and... so was she. As she played things by ear, she found a job of her own, and suddenly, she was invested in this world. Whether she meant to or not, she began to grow roots. Two woke up slow, and dreary, and... calm. She couldn't stop smiling, she committed to long term projects, and she sat down with Nos and contributed when he talked about the future.

It took months, but for the first time in over a decade, Two went a day without fearing for her life.

Nos offered her his hand and she took it, letting him lift her from her seat at the hearth and spinning around.

"I love this song," he purred, swaying with her in the middle of their living room. He hooked one arm around her back, folding his hand around hers. Warm light washed through the window, glinting off the cool metal of his face. She leaned into him, hovering higher, pressing her visor to his lips before resting her head on his shoulder. She couldn't stop smiling as they danced.

"This is so much better than I thought it was going to be," Two whispered.

"What? I'm not such a bad dancer."

"No, not that," she laughed, "living with you. I didn't know I could be happy like this."

He gave a low chuckle of his own, and she felt it rumble against her visor where she had it tucked against his neck. "You're telling me. I mean, I knew living with you would be everything I wanted and more, but I never expected to feel like I belonged. It's marvelous."

"You... expected this?"

He twirled her around. "As long as I had you, I knew my life would be remarkable. You've made things work out that never should have," he nuzzled the top of her head, "We've dealt with some terrible, awful shit, but now we're here. I think we finally made it, my dear."

"Yeah," her voice caught, "I think ‒ I think we have."

Nos slowed to a stop, all the warmth in the world in his voice. "What are you crying for, love?"

"I don't know," she beamed.

Nos stood back from her a bit to look into her visor. He lifted her hand, and though she lacked a palm, he pressed his lips to the undersides of her fingers. "You deserve this, Eve. This is the life you should have had from the beginning, but you've worked so hard, you've earned this and so much more."

"This is real," her voice wavered, but she hovered even higher to press her forehead against his, "This is my life now. I mean, I know we've lived here for a while, but ‒ "

"I know," Nos whispered. Two closed her eyeforms and held him closer. "We made it."


	58. Or

It was quiet. Light streamed through the broad windows of the lab, everything sparse, new, the air still thick with the must of construction only a few weeks prior. Nos-4-a2 was focused, pouring all of his attention into his work. Two shifted slowly in a swivel chair, going from side to side, swiping at a tablet. She was supposed to be looking for a job.

Supposed to. Her gaze kept drifting out the window, and she found herself imagining the gardens she was going to plant on their dusty lot. If this would be Nos's view while he worked, she'd have to make him something nice there. Different fountains and flowers bubbled through her head, perhaps trees... the shade would be nice when the sun started to set since these were west-facing windows.

"Any luck?" Nos asked. His tone was absent, but she was familiar enough with him at this point to know when he was reading her.

"Still looking," she hummed, pulling her eyeforms back to her tablet. No... no... no...

"Did you finish your resume?"

"One helped me do it," she flicked to the next listing. No, not that one, either... Two reached out with one hand and pushed off the counter, setting her chair spinning once, twice, and... she was facing the wrong direction. She reached back and righted herself. Nos still hadn't looked up, using thin tools to dissect a tiny power cell, his optics zoomed in far enough that she wasn't in his peripheral.

"You should just send it into a few places just to see if they respond. You might like it once you go in for an interview, and they could even make you a better offer than what they have listed."

"Mmm. Maybe," she continued to swipe. No. No. She looked up, her mind drifting, and started to watch him work. His hands were precise, delicate. He seemed frozen in place, hunched over his work surface. She watched his face, his optic slightly squinted, the barest hint of a fang resting on his lower lip. He stayed mostly still for a long while as she waved her finger over her tablet, pretending to read the job descriptions. His attention looked unwavering, but he still had his sensors trained on her. He knew what she was doing. It was all a matter of who mentioned it first.

After a while, he laid his tools down on a small cloth laid out on the workbench. He blinked a few times, resetting the zoom on his optics, and straightened his back. She watched him roll his neck and stretch his arms over his head, picturing the way his shoulders moved in their sockets beneath his cape. She knew that vision well, as she had been treated to it most every morning when she watched him get out of bed. Two gave up the ghost, resting her head on her hand, taking in the way he sank a few inches when he relaxed from his stretch.

"You're not doing this on your own, then."

Again, he knew. It wasn't a question.

"Hm. I guess not."

"Fine, I'm at a good enough stopping point anyway." Nos drifted to her and put one hand on the back of her chair, taking the tablet with the other. He leaned over her and she continued to stare, her visor now level with his chest.

"Eve. Focus."

"...I am."

Nos let out a sigh, perhaps slightly more dramatic than needed, and laid the tablet on the workbench. "I can't believe you're ogling me in my workplace."

"I can."

He huffed, letting his cheek fall against the top of her head. "I'll file a complaint after we find something you'd like to apply for. Come on, you're not even trying."

Two put her hand out to stop him from picking the tablet back up. "Or..."

"No. Come on. Focus, you've been putting this off for days."

She tilted her head, making him lift his so they could look at each other. " _Or..._ "

"That might work on me every other time, but not _this_ time! I'm not letting you leave this chair until you pick one. It'll be easy once you just get it over with."

Two's eyeforms narrowed. Futile as it was, Nos's persistence was admirable in the following thirty seconds.

Then they went with "or."


	59. Awry

"What a ‒ " Two lapsed into Bn'L code for a second, spitting a string of beeps and whistles, " ‒ bust."

"Eve!"

"Sorry, I just... this day didn't go at all how I wanted it to."

"Well, come here. Sit with me."

Two practically collapsed against him, putting her head on his chest.

"Now, what all went wrong?"

Two squinted. "We finally have a day off together, and I couldn't even enjoy it. I've been daydreaming about it all week and I'm just... disappointed. I'm sorry we didn't get to relax like we planned."

Nos thought for a moment, rubbing his thumb on her side.

"I know you're stressed, but it's not your fault. Maybe you've just been trying to relax the wrong way?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, the things we had planned... they're just not what you needed. That can't be helped, love. Why don't we try something else?"

Two seemed to unwind a little. "Like what?"

"Now that you've taken care of what you needed to, how about we watch something nice, or read? It's been ages since we read together. We don't need to work on projects all the time. We can just be vegetables. We deserve that every once in a while, I'm just sorry I didn't suggest it sooner... and that I wasn't more on alert. We could have taken care of this before it all piled up on you."

"Hey, it can't be helped."

"But I can help now. Here..." Nos reached over her to her bedside table, pulling a book out from under a tablet. "You started reading this to me, but we haven't touched it in _months_. May I read it to you?"

A laugh forced its way out of her speakers. "But you haven't read it before. Plus, you never do voices!"

"I can do voices! You've never asked me to."

"You've never offered to read!"

The pages ruffled as Nos flipped the novel open to the bookmark, tracing the ink with a talon. "Now I have. Since it's my first time reading it, we can discuss as we go, can't we?"

Two giggled, "I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Alright, now... would you mind refreshing my memory for the context of all this? I can't remember anything we've read."

"Really?"

"What? It's been so long, and your voice is so soothing ‒ "

"Fine," Two laughed, shaking her head. She scooted closer and nuzzled her visor against his cheek. "Thanks for this, Nos."

He smiled and hugged her closer. "Anything for you, my dear."


End file.
